tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-44699983994173413222024-03-05T02:56:22.463-07:00According to DazzTyler "Dazz" Daswickhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03275267111192809648noreply@blogger.comBlogger84125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4469998399417341322.post-7295744127356007752014-03-11T13:59:00.003-07:002014-03-11T13:59:54.940-07:00Louis CK Bible Study Week 4 Recap: the Evil of Jizanthapus<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjeOfWv82jTpjZWJdtapX_vYfL_wlyy0mEEVgSDy-ctCPOCqBjA94-i_BAlM3o6-1ZBbtbHsWKM_9Vay74usfYhrc96q-JTS3iNGIS2ruQBHdtLslVopVonQiL4MhWtdKdrvrdsKUl2k0Gt/s1600/louisck4.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjeOfWv82jTpjZWJdtapX_vYfL_wlyy0mEEVgSDy-ctCPOCqBjA94-i_BAlM3o6-1ZBbtbHsWKM_9Vay74usfYhrc96q-JTS3iNGIS2ruQBHdtLslVopVonQiL4MhWtdKdrvrdsKUl2k0Gt/s1600/louisck4.jpg" height="320" width="257" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">This one was custom.</td></tr>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> Throughout our
culture, the idea of the Devil has taken many forms. Is Satan the weird furry
red thing at the end of <i>Insidious</i>? Is
he the weird gender-neutral albino from <i>Passion
of the Christ</i>? Or, is he embodied in rap music, such as Naughty by Nature’s
classic “Hip Hop Hooray,” that I may or may not be listening to right now? The
Devil can be totally mysterious, and because of that, he can also be
terrifying. This week, the Delta Chi Bible Study looks to find out who this
Satan guy is—through the Great Deceiver’s interactions with our main man Jesus
Christ. That is right, Jesus and Satan once squared off in the desert and <i>completely threw down.</i> As always, let’s
look at this with our pal Louis CK.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> First off, watch the
clip!<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> Alright—what does
that have to do with the Devil? First thing we talked about at Delta Chi is
what exactly we picture the Devil to be. What does he look like? Is he an angel
or a serpent or some kind of superhuman? The reality is, Satan can take many
forms (with our guy Louis CK, he just happens to be embodied in a little
shit-kindergartner). And while we may not really see him in a tangible form
these days—sorry, horror movies—he does work through something called
temptation. Let’s look to our passage for a picture of what this looks like.
This is out of Mark, but you could also call this <i>Jesus/Satan Royal Smackdown Celebrity Rumble</i> (because, seriously,
the Bible would be so much cooler if you sprinkled it with some WWE-inspired
chapter titles).<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Matthew
4<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Then Jesus was led by the Spirit into the wilderness to be
tempted by the devil. <b><sup>2 </sup></b>After fasting forty
days and forty nights, he was hungry. <b><sup>3 </sup></b>The
tempter came to him and said, “If you are the Son of God, tell these
stones to become bread.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<b><sup><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">4 </span></sup></b><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Jesus
answered, “It is written: ‘Man shall not live on bread alone, but on every
word that comes from the mouth of God.’”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<b><sup><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">5 </span></sup></b><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Then the devil took
him to the holy city and had him stand on the highest point of the temple. <b><sup>6 </sup></b>“If
you are the Son of God,” he said, “throw yourself down. For it is written:<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">“‘He will command his
angels concerning you,<br />
</span><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Courier New"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">and they will lift
you up in their hands,<br />
</span><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Courier New"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">so that you will not
strike your foot against a stone.’”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<b><sup><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">7 </span></sup></b><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Jesus answered
him, “It is also written: ‘Do not put the Lord your God to the test.’”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<b><sup><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">8 </span></sup></b><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Again, the devil took
him to a very high mountain and showed him all the kingdoms of the world and
their splendor. <b><sup>9 </sup></b>“All this I will give you,” he
said, “if you will bow down and worship me.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<b><sup><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">10 </span></sup></b><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Jesus said to
him, “Away from me, Satan! For it is written: ‘Worship the Lord your
God, and serve him only.’”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<b><sup><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">11 </span></sup></b><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Then the devil left
him, and angels came and attended him.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"> There it is—one of
the ultimate battles of good and evil in the history of the world, as told in
the bible. That is some real talk going on between Jesus and the Devil, but on
the surface, it seems like a bunch of cryptic <i>Da Vinci Code</i>-type talk—just a bunch of guys spouting off rules and
codes and trying to outwit each other one after the other.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"> Well essentially,
that is exactly what is happening. Satan is trying to take Scripture out of
context and use those passages against Jesus, but Jesus is able to reject each
and every one. Let’s break this down.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">The First Temptation—Physical Needs<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"> </span></b><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Satan first asks
Jesus to turn the nearby stones into bread. Remember that the J-Man has been
fasting for 40 days at this point (world record for longest fast? 43 days—this is
some serious stuff going down), so this temptation would be a serious test of
willpower. To us, the choice seems easy—Jesus can do whatever he wants, so why
not just have some bread and kick it for a while? However, Jesus is smarter
than this, and rather than giving in to his hunger and appeasing the Devil, he
simply comments that man does not live on bread alone, but rather, finds
satisfaction in his relationship with God. Solid counter. Notice how he barely
even acknowledges the temptation.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">The Second Temptation—Love<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"> Then, the Devil takes Jesus up to the highest
place in all of Jerusalem. He asks Jesus to throw himself off, because God’s
angels are guaranteed to catch him. He will prove his relationship with God in
this way. Again, it seems like it would make sense for Jesus to just <i>do the miracle</i>. BAM—I am the Son of God.
Boom, roasted. Again, however, he does not. Instead, Jesus turns to Scripture
and explains that God has commanded us not to put Him to the test. His response
is again characterized by a total disregard for what the Devil is asking. There
is no consideration or hesitation at all—Jesus just will not do it.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">The Third Temptation—Power<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"> Finally, the Devil asks one simple thing:
for Jesus to bow down and worship him. In return, Jesus will be made ruler of
everything he can see. Jesus pays this the least attention of all, denouncing
Satan and declaring that he will worship only the Father. The Devil disappears
and Jesus chills with the angels for a while.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"> What remains consistent? A couple things.
For one, Jesus never performs the miracles. He uses Scripture to counter the
Devil’s use of Scripture (which we will talk about in a minute), and never
gives in. We will see that this is the perfect model of how we should respond
to Satan as well (Jesus Christ’s Keys to the Game, if you will). <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"> The other thing that remains consistent is
the Devil’s sheer incomprehension for who he is dealing with. The Scripture he
quotes is horribly out of context (the angels he refers to in the second
temptation can be seen as highly metaphorical in the Psalm they are taken from—that
passage itself actually talks about how God will protect us and shelter us in
all situations, not about how he is going to send an army of angels for us to
use whenever we want), and his understanding of Jesus is something narrow and
limited. You see, the Devil tempts Jesus with things that would typically work
on someone human. Food—we need that. Love—we crave that. Power—we demand that.
The thing is, since Jesus is just as much God as he is man, these things do not
have the same implications for him that they do for us.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"> In a way, though, this should be
encouraging. If we have Jesus on our side—the Devil literally has no idea how
to defeat us! He does not understand the power that Christ has! That is
amazing! Of course, this does not mean we have a Get Out Of Jail Free card for
every time the Devil tries to deceive us. In fact, we still have a lot of work
to do.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"> Thank goodness for this passage, because Jesus has given us his Keys to the Game. Now,
from a Christian perspective, it is well-known that the Devil works in the
world. He tempts us with all sorts of things—terrible food, unsatisfying
relationships, porn—essentially, a lot of things that turn us toward ourselves
and away from God. The Devil wants us to put ourselves before God—bottom line.
He tried to do this with Jesus in the desert. He tried to tempt Jesus with all
of these worldly things so that Jesus would break his fast and come into
conflict with God.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"> Here is how Jesus won, or rather, here are
the Jesus Christ Keys to the Game:<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Georgia; mso-fareast-font-family: Georgia;">1.<span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: 7pt;"> </span></span><!--[endif]--><b><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Know yourself.</span></b><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"> Jesus acknowledges his human side,
which might be why the Devil thought he could sway Him with worldly things.
However, Jesus also is confident with his place in God’s Kingdom (<i>his</i> kingdom, really). He understands
what it means to be the Son of God, and with that knowledge, he is able to
outwit the Devil using Scripture. He can lean on his knowledge of Himself.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Georgia; mso-fareast-font-family: Georgia;">2.<span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: 7pt;"> </span></span><!--[endif]--><b><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Know the Devil.</span></b><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"> Jesus knows how the Devil works, and
this is predominantly seen in the final temptation. The Devil offers Christ the
world, but in actuality, there is nothing the Devil can offer that Jesus does
not have already. In fact, the Devil has no power to give anything. All Satan
can do is tempt us—he cannot create evil people or evil action, he can only
urge us to consider those actions. And, since Jesus knows how to counter these
temptations, he can renounce the Devil completely. Pretty badass, in all
honesty.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Georgia; mso-fareast-font-family: Georgia;">3.<span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: 7pt;"> </span></span><!--[endif]--><b><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Lean on your homies.</span></b><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"> What does Jesus do at the end of the
passage? He surrounds himself with angels—people who can support him and be
with him. In our own lives, we can do similar things with our friends and our
family, and in settings like Delta Chi, our fraternity brothers. We need fellowships
around us who can support our relationship with God and serve as scaffolding on
our climb to heaven. Even Jesus, in his hour of need, turned to his friends. We
saw it at the Last Supper with his disciples, and we see it in his time with
the angels here.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"> So this week, think about how you respond to
temptation, and think about how you use Christ’s Keys to the Game. Remember
that the Devil is real, but that God is undefeated against him. Jesus wins
every time when it comes to <i>Jesus/Stan
Royal Smackdown Celebrity Rumble</i>, so even though it does not make for great
drama, it does make for some incredible lessons.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"> Peace.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
Tyler "Dazz" Daswickhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03275267111192809648noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4469998399417341322.post-39034017480546184922014-02-24T14:33:00.000-07:002014-02-24T14:33:07.621-07:00Louis CK Bible Study Week 3 Recap: Did You Shit All Over Every Polar Bear?!<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgfXcmEBNGsztCRWbBABiHMHKkmREzvzfcf45GyqCgLzKMS-pZ3HuQ5a_E1yrMPfH5V6-IvRyWPCHmRpGazEN2mhLl5DCRf1HJMDKfINNyp4D-95I_0KbUSpbf1xTaSWrKILHbzc3xyN8cl/s1600/louisck3.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgfXcmEBNGsztCRWbBABiHMHKkmREzvzfcf45GyqCgLzKMS-pZ3HuQ5a_E1yrMPfH5V6-IvRyWPCHmRpGazEN2mhLl5DCRf1HJMDKfINNyp4D-95I_0KbUSpbf1xTaSWrKILHbzc3xyN8cl/s1600/louisck3.jpg" height="320" width="257" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Weekly Jesus meme, per usual.</td></tr>
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<span class="text"><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;"> Welcome back, friends! If you want to start this bible study at the
beginning, check out our <a href="http://www.accordingtodazz.blogspot.com/2014/01/god-is-like-shitty-girlfriend.html" target="_blank">introduction</a>. You can find the subsequent parts I and
II in the According to Dazz archives.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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Instead of starting with a clip this week, I actually want you guys to
read this quick passage first; check out Genesis below.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span class="text"><b><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;">Genesis 1:27-31<o:p></o:p></span></b></span></div>
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<span class="text"><b><sup><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;">27 </span></sup></b></span><span class="text"><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;">So God
created</span></span><span class="apple-converted-space"><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;"> </span></span><span class="text"><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;">mankind</span></span><span class="apple-converted-space"><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;"> </span></span><span class="text"><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;">in his own image,</span></span><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;"></span><br />
<span class="indent-1-breaks"><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;"> </span></span><span class="text"><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;">in the image of God</span></span><span class="apple-converted-space"><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;"> </span></span><span class="text"><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;">he created them;</span></span><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;"><br />
</span><span class="indent-1-breaks"><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;"> </span></span><span class="text"><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;">male and female</span></span><span class="apple-converted-space"><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;"> </span></span><span class="text"><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;">he created them.</span></span><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span id="en-NIV-28"><span class="text"><b><sup><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;">28 </span></sup></b></span><span class="text"><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;">God blessed them and said to them,</span></span><span class="apple-converted-space"><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;"> </span></span><span class="text"><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;">“Be fruitful and increase in number;</span></span><span class="apple-converted-space"><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;"> </span></span><span class="text"><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;">fill the earthand subdue it. Rule
over</span></span><span class="apple-converted-space"><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;"> </span></span><span class="text"><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;">the fish in the sea and the birds in the sky and over every living
creature that moves on the ground.”</span></span></span><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;"> <span class="text"><b><sup>29 </sup></b>Then
God said, “I give you every seed-bearing plant on the face of the whole earth
and every tree that has fruit with seed in it. They will be yours for food.</span><span class="apple-converted-space"></span> </span><span class="text"><b><sup><span id="en-NIV-30">30 </span></sup></b>And to all the beasts of the earth and all the
birds in the sky and all the creatures that move along the ground—everything
that has the breath of lifein it—I give every green plant for food.” And it was
so.</span><o:p></o:p></div>
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<span class="text"><b><sup><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;">31 </span></sup></b></span><span class="text"><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;">God saw all that he had made,</span></span><span class="apple-converted-space"><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;"> </span></span><span class="text"><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;">and it was very good.</span></span><span class="apple-converted-space"><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;"> </span></span><span class="text"><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;">And there was evening, and there was
morning—the sixth day.</span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span class="text"><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;"> You have all that? Great. It is time for our
good friend Louis CK to lend his thoughts on all of this. Here is your clip for
this week!<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span class="MsoHyperlink"><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt; line-height: 115%;"> </span></span><span class="MsoHyperlink"><span style="color: windowtext; font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt; line-height: 115%;">Now
buckle up, because you have <i>another </i>passage
to read. Well, we are going to be doing a little something here called
comparing and contrasting, and to do that, you need two things (wow—rocket science!),
so suck it up. Here is John 1—many Christians would consider this “classic
Gospel”—kind of like the <i>Dark Side of the
Moon </i>of the Bible. It is one of the best-produced passages in the entire
holy book, and a great intro into an incredible world of thought.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span class="MsoHyperlink"><b><span style="color: windowtext; font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt; line-height: 115%;">John 1:1-14<o:p></o:p></span></b></span></div>
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<span class="chapternum"><b><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;">1 </span></b></span><span class="text"><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;">In the beginning was the Word,</span></span><span class="apple-converted-space"><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;"> </span></span><span class="text"><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;">and the Word was with God,</span></span><span class="apple-converted-space"><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;"> </span></span><span class="text"><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;">and the Word was God.</span></span><span class="apple-converted-space"><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;"> </span></span><span id="en-NIV-26047"><span class="text"><b><sup><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;">2 </span></sup></b></span><span class="text"><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;">He was with God in the beginning.</span></span><span class="apple-converted-space"></span><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;"> </span></span><span id="en-NIV-26048"><span class="text"><b><sup><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;">3 </span></sup></b></span><span class="text"><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;">Through him
all things were made; without him nothing was made that has been made.</span></span><span class="apple-converted-space"></span><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;"> </span></span><span id="en-NIV-26049"><span class="text"><b><sup><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;">4 </span></sup></b></span><span class="text"><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;">In him was
life,</span></span><span class="apple-converted-space"><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;"> </span></span><span class="text"><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;">and that life was the light</span></span><span class="apple-converted-space"><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;"> </span></span><span class="text"><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;">of all mankind.</span></span></span><span class="apple-converted-space"><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;"> </span></span><span id="en-NIV-26050"><span class="text"><b><sup><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;">5 </span></sup></b></span><span class="text"><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;">The light shines in the darkness,</span></span><span class="apple-converted-space"><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;"> </span></span><span class="text"><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;">and the darkness has not overcome</span></span><span class="apple-converted-space"><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;"> </span></span><span class="text"><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;">it.</span></span><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;"></span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span id="en-NIV-26051"><span class="text"><b><sup><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;">6 </span></sup></b></span><span class="text"><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;">There was a
man sent from God whose name was John.</span></span><span class="apple-converted-space"></span><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;"> </span></span><span id="en-NIV-26052"><span class="text"><b><sup><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;">7 </span></sup></b></span><span class="text"><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;">He came as a
witness to testify concerning that light, so that through him all might believe.</span></span><span class="apple-converted-space"></span><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;"> </span></span><span id="en-NIV-26053"><span class="text"><b><sup><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;">8 </span></sup></b></span><span class="text"><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;">He himself
was not the light; he came only as a witness to the light.</span></span></span><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span id="en-NIV-26054"><span class="text"><b><sup><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;">9 </span></sup></b></span><span class="text"><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;">The true
light</span></span><span class="apple-converted-space"><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;"> </span></span><span class="text"><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;">that gives light to everyone</span></span><span class="apple-converted-space"><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;"> </span></span><span class="text"><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;">was coming into the world.</span></span></span><span class="apple-converted-space"><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;"> </span></span><span id="en-NIV-26055"><span class="text"><b><sup><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;">10 </span></sup></b></span><span class="text"><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;">He was in the world, and though the world was made through him,</span></span><span class="apple-converted-space"><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;"> </span></span><span class="text"><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;">the world did not recognize him.</span></span></span><span class="apple-converted-space"><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;"> </span></span><span id="en-NIV-26056"><span class="text"><b><sup><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;">11 </span></sup></b></span><span class="text"><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;">He came to that which was his own, but his own did not receive him.</span></span><span class="apple-converted-space"></span><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;"> </span></span><span id="en-NIV-26057"><span class="text"><b><sup><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;">12 </span></sup></b></span><span class="text"><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;">Yet to all
who did receive him, to those who believed</span></span><span class="apple-converted-space"><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;"> </span></span><span class="text"><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;">in his name,</span></span><span class="apple-converted-space"><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;"> </span></span><span class="text"><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;">he gave the right to become children
of God—</span></span></span><span class="apple-converted-space"><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;"> </span></span><span id="en-NIV-26058"><span class="text"><b><sup><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;">13 </span></sup></b></span><span class="text"><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;">children born not of natural descent, nor of human decision or a
husband’s will, but born of God.<o:p></o:p></span></span></span></div>
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<span class="text"><b><sup><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;">14 </span></sup></b></span><span class="text"><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;">The Word became flesh</span></span><span class="apple-converted-space"><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;"> </span></span><span class="text"><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;">and made his dwelling among us. We
have seen his glory,</span></span><span class="apple-converted-space"><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;"> </span></span><span class="text"><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;">the glory of the one and only Son, who came from the Father, full
of grace</span></span><span class="apple-converted-space"><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;"> </span></span><span class="text"><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;">and truth.</span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;"> Essentially, we have a story here told in
three parts. Let’s go in order:<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;">Part I: The Ideal World<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;"> </span></b><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;">Look back at
that Genesis 1 passage. Life seems pretty great, right? God creates us with the
mindset that we would become masters of this earth, and live with the rest of His
creation in a perfect, harmonious setting. We would be a reflection of God
Himself, that is, we would carry out His original intention of being people of
love and compassion and grace. We were made in the image of God—crazy—and God
looked to us to reveal that in our behavior.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;">Part II: When we shit on the polar bears<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;"> The world that Louis CK talks about,
however, is something very different than what God intended. Louis CK shows how
today, we value things like expediency, convenience, and bacon over the more
important areas of life, such as, you know, taking care of what we all share
(i.e. the world). Instead of living out our lives the way God wanted us to live,
we have put ourselves first. As a result, the polar bears are brown, oil is oozing
all over the place, and God is looking down with his face in his hand going “What
the <i>fuck</i> did you do?!”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;"> The world is broken. You know that funny
Internet picture of the dog who trashed his whole house while the owner stepped
out? We are the dog. We took the vision that God wanted for us and we chose to
ignore it. We did our own thing. Sometimes, we still do.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;">Part III: The Word enters the picture</span></b><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;"> I guess the first question we have to answer
here is “What <i>is</i> the Word?” Well, the
short answer is that the Word is Jesus, the Son of God. This passage refers to
Him as the Word for good reason—it actually comes from the Greek word <i>“logos,”</i> which is rooted in the idea
that the spoken word itself has tremendous power. Think of the creation story
up there in Genesis 1. Throughout that chapter, God speaks things into being—his
words have all the power. Jesus can be considered as the Word because of his
humanness. He is here to send us the message—literally, a verbal message—of God’s
love for us. Bam, origin story.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;"> The key line is that the Word became flesh—God
became man. Is it important to note, also, that the Bible never says that Jesus
was <i>made</i> or <i>created.</i> Rather, the text is careful to say that Jesus was
begotten. The idea of something being begotten comes from royal blood lines.
Kings would beget a son, with the idea that one day, that son would become
equal to himself (that is, a king). Now, when you make something, you create
something that is different than yourself. God made man. We make things in our
kitchens. Things like that. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;"> The Bible, though, says Jesus was begotten,
not made. That is to say, Jesus was someone who <i>is the same</i> as God. If Jesus were created, he would clearly be
something different, but he was not created. Fascinating.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;"> But what was the big deal of Jesus being
here at all? Why did he have to come? Well, it was all in response to God’s
original intentions being broken by us people. The world was a place of sin and
despair and emptiness, and God decided that, to hell with it, he better come on
down here himself and help us figure out our problems. God needed to reveal to
us that, because he loves us so much, he was willing to give up his Son
(essentially, give up <i>himself</i>) to
save us from this broken world. Even though we shit on the polar bears, God
wanted to give us another chance, and we have this chance in Jesus, right now.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;"> So as you go out this
week, consider this: what was God’s original intention for you? In Delta Chi,
we talked about being a brotherhood, a place where men could gather and support
each other and grow together. In some of the habits that we have now, we might
have lost some sight of that, but as a bible study, we were able to sit down
and bring the focus back to what was important. We may exchange harsh emails at
times and neglect to clean our chapter room, but at the end of the day we have
to turn back to the foundation of friendship, community, and bro-mancing that
brought us all together. You can do the same for yourself, for your family,
your friends. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;"> The challenge of this
week is to bring yourself to look at God’s original intentions for you, and how
you might have gone away from that (what polar bear have you shit on?). Make a
commitment, something tangible and substantial, that will help keep you aligned
toward that idea of being created in God’s image. It might be challenging, but
think back to the Louis CK clip: do you <i>really</i>
want to be that person who God facepalms in front of?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;"> Peace.</span></div>
Tyler "Dazz" Daswickhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03275267111192809648noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4469998399417341322.post-32129048691728170072014-02-14T19:05:00.000-07:002014-02-14T19:05:00.220-07:00Louis CK Bible Study Week 2 Recap: You Have to Clean Up Your Kids When You Kill Them<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjSdixvz1oRIYvWk2BbDJHskNrkJKIBYf15dMvkFsNqex-hebHk87VcMith2fDJTTeRCxcWYHeE_IDSw0k3CEAHDXRHPg7o5pdFvVjt5mVOoCWLaJ6_tDWwmlz_-iepe9oeqKwKPH_V8i4E/s1600/louis+ck+study2.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjSdixvz1oRIYvWk2BbDJHskNrkJKIBYf15dMvkFsNqex-hebHk87VcMith2fDJTTeRCxcWYHeE_IDSw0k3CEAHDXRHPg7o5pdFvVjt5mVOoCWLaJ6_tDWwmlz_-iepe9oeqKwKPH_V8i4E/s1600/louis+ck+study2.jpg" height="320" width="257" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Weekly Jesus meme. Classic.</td></tr>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> Welcome back,
everyone! For part one of the Louis CK Bible Study, <a href="http://www.accordingtodazz.blogspot.com/2014/02/louis-ck-bible-study-week-1-recap-god.html">click
here</a>.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 15.333333015441895px;"> Alright, this week we are going to be talked about some pretty dicey stuff, so first thing is first: watch the clip!</span></div>
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<br />
Right off the bat, let’s respond to
that and tackle the elephant in the room: I am definitely not ruling out the
idea that I might be capable of murder if it was legal. As a journalist, I
think it might serve one’s writing well to just have that experience on your
resum</span><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman";">é</span><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;">. Now that we know what kind of
person I am (. . . or do we?), we can turn to the good stuff.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> The passage this
week is shorter than usual—you can read it for yourself right here:<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt;">Genesis
16: 6-9<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
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<span class="text"><b><sup><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;">6 </span></sup></b></span><span class="text"><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;">“Your slave
is in your hands,” Abram said. “Do with her whatever you think best.” Then
Sarai mistreated</span></span><span class="apple-converted-space"><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;"> </span></span><span class="text"><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;">Hagar; so she fled from her.</span></span><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span id="en-NIV-389"><span class="text"><b><sup><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;">7 </span></sup></b></span><span class="text"><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;">The angel of the</span></span><span class="apple-converted-space"><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;"> </span></span><span class="small-caps"><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt; font-variant: small-caps;">Lord</span></span><span class="apple-converted-space"><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;"> </span></span><span class="text"><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;">found Hagar near a spring in the
desert; it was the spring that is beside the road to Shur.</span></span><span class="apple-converted-space"></span><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;"> </span></span><span id="en-NIV-390"><span class="text"><b><sup><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;">8 </span></sup></b></span><span class="text"><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;">And he said,
“Hagar,</span></span><span class="apple-converted-space"><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;"> </span></span><span class="text"><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;">slave of Sarai, where have you come from, and where are you going?”</span></span><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;"></span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span class="text"><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;">“I’m running away from my mistress Sarai,” she answered.</span></span><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span id="en-NIV-391"><span class="text"><b><sup><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;">9 </span></sup></b></span><span class="text"><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;">Then the angel of the</span></span><span class="apple-converted-space"><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;"> </span></span><span class="small-caps"><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt; font-variant: small-caps;">Lord</span></span><span class="apple-converted-space"><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;"> </span></span><span class="text"><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;">told her, “Go back to your mistress
and submit to her.”</span></span></span><span class="apple-converted-space"><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;"> </span></span><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> Wait a second—read
that again. Abram and Sarai have some problem with their slave, named Hagar, so
Sarai mistreats her (which, from what we know about the treatment of servants
and slave in the days of the Old Testament, must have been pretty awful to be
called <i>mistreatment</i>). Hagar runs
away, but an angel of the Lord appears to her and demands that she goes back to
her mistress and “submit to her.” That seems pretty awful, right? It certainly
does not sound like the God that Christians talk about—the God of love and
fairness and compassion. So what gives? Turns out, it is all a matter of
context, just like Louis CK discusses in our clip. Check out the full passage
now, with the original excerpt in red:<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;">Genesis
16: 1-10<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
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<span class="text"><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;">Now Sarai,</span></span><span class="apple-converted-space"><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;"> </span></span><span class="text"><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;">Abram’s wife, had borne him no
children.</span></span><span class="apple-converted-space"><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;"> </span></span><span class="text"><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;">But she had an Egyptian slave</span></span><span class="apple-converted-space"><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;"> </span></span><span class="text"><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;">named Hagar;</span></span><span class="apple-converted-space"><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;"> </span></span><span id="en-NIV-384"><span class="text"><b><sup><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;">2 </span></sup></b></span><span class="text"><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;">so she said to Abram, “The</span></span><span class="apple-converted-space"><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;"> </span></span><span class="small-caps"><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt; font-variant: small-caps;">Lord</span></span><span class="apple-converted-space"><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;"> </span></span><span class="text"><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;">has kept me from having children.</span></span><span class="apple-converted-space"><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;"> </span></span><span class="text"><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;">Go, sleep with my slave; perhaps I
can build a family through her.”</span></span><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;"></span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span class="text"><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;">Abram agreed
to what Sarai said.</span></span><span class="apple-converted-space"><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;"> </span></span><span id="en-NIV-385"><span class="text"><b><sup><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;">3 </span></sup></b></span><span class="text"><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;">So after Abram had been living in Canaan</span></span><span class="apple-converted-space"><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;"> </span></span><span class="text"><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;">ten years,</span></span><span class="apple-converted-space"><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;"> </span></span><span class="text"><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;">Sarai his wife took her Egyptian
slave Hagar and gave her to her husband to be his wife.</span></span></span><span class="apple-converted-space"><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;"> </span></span><span id="en-NIV-386"><span class="text"><b><sup><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;">4 </span></sup></b></span><span class="text"><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;">He slept with Hagar,</span></span><span class="apple-converted-space"><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;"> </span></span><span class="text"><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;">and she conceived.</span></span></span><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span class="text"><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;">When she
knew she was pregnant, she began to despise her mistress.</span></span><span class="apple-converted-space"><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;"> </span></span><span id="en-NIV-387"><span class="text"><b><sup><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;">5 </span></sup></b></span><span class="text"><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;">Then Sarai said to Abram, “You are responsible for the wrong I am
suffering. I put my slave in your arms, and now that she knows she is pregnant,
she despises me. May the</span></span><span class="small-caps"><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt; font-variant: small-caps;">Lord</span></span><span class="apple-converted-space"><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;"> </span></span><span class="text"><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;">judge between you and me.”</span></span><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;"></span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span id="en-NIV-388"><span class="text"><b><sup><span style="color: red; font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt;">6 </span></sup></b></span><span class="text"><span style="color: red; font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt;">“Your slave is
in your hands,” Abram said. “Do with her whatever you think best.” Then Sarai
mistreated</span></span><span class="apple-converted-space"><span style="color: red; font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt;"> </span></span><span class="text"><span style="color: red; font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt;">Hagar; so she fled from her.</span></span></span><span style="color: red; font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span id="en-NIV-389"><span class="text"><b><sup><span style="color: red; font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt;">7 </span></sup></b></span><span class="text"><span style="color: red; font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt;">The angel of
the</span></span><span class="apple-converted-space"><span style="color: red; font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt;"> </span></span><span class="small-caps"><span style="color: red; font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; font-variant: small-caps;">Lord</span></span><span class="apple-converted-space"><span style="color: red; font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt;"> </span></span><span class="text"><span style="color: red; font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt;">found Hagar near a springin the
desert; it was the spring that is beside the road to Shur.</span></span><span class="apple-converted-space"></span><span style="color: red; font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt;"> </span></span><span id="en-NIV-390"><span class="text"><b><sup><span style="color: red; font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt;">8 </span></sup></b></span><span class="text"><span style="color: red; font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt;">And he said,
“Hagar,</span></span><span class="apple-converted-space"><span style="color: red; font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt;"> </span></span><span class="text"><span style="color: red; font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt;">slave of Sarai, where have you come from, and where are you going?”</span></span><span style="color: red; font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt;"></span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span class="text"><span style="color: red; font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt;">“I’m running
away from my mistress Sarai,” she answered.</span></span><span style="color: red; font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span id="en-NIV-391"><span class="text"><b><sup><span style="color: red; font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt;">9 </span></sup></b></span><span class="text"><span style="color: red; font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt;">Then the angel
of the</span></span><span class="apple-converted-space"><span style="color: red; font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt;"> </span></span><span class="small-caps"><span style="color: red; font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; font-variant: small-caps;">Lord</span></span><span class="apple-converted-space"><span style="color: red; font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt;"> </span></span><span class="text"><span style="color: red; font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt;">told her, “Go back to your mistress
and submit to her.”</span></span></span><span class="apple-converted-space"><span style="color: red; font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt;"> </span></span><span id="en-NIV-392"><span class="text"><b><sup><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt;">10 </span></sup></b></span><span class="text"><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt;">The
angel added, “I will increase your descendants so much that they will be too
numerous to count.”</span></span><span style="color: red; font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt;"></span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span id="en-NIV-393"><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> It might make a little more sense now, but
just in case, here is the Quick and Dirty.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> So Abram (soon to
be Abraham) has this Sarai chick, who will soon be Sarah. Abram and Sarai were
promised a kid by God, but still did not have one for a while, so out of sheer
impatience, Sarai told Abram to sleep with their slave. Abram, with a total
frat move, totally does, and Hagar is knocked up with Ishmael (who, fun fact,
will eventually become the founder of Islam—pretty awesome). Sarai is pretty
upset about this, and treats Hagar so badly that Hagar runs away. Luckily, the
angel of the Lord tracks her down and tells her to return to Sarai, <i>but not before he makes a promise that Hagar
will be blessed with a lot of descendants.<o:p></o:p></i></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> The difference
between the two passages should be stark. In one, the Lord seems cruel and
rigid, but when placed into the greater context of Genesis, there is a reason
behind the return—if Hagar trusts in God now, she will receive a ton of
blessings to come. What appears to be a negative in one sense becomes better in
another—just like Louis CK points out with murder. The societal context of
murder right now says that it is wrong and negative, but when placed into
another context where society is fine with killing, it becomes a positive
because you do not have to deal with your asshole kids all day.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> The importance of
context is rampant throughout Scripture—this
is by no means an isolated incident. Google “messed up Bible verses” and
witness the insane power of context. You take a lot of this stuff out of the
source material, and it sounds really messed up, but if you put it in the light
it was meant to be read under, and the real meaning tells you something
different.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> In Delta Chi last
week, we discussed some more practical things through the contextual lens—most notably,
we discussed drinking. Drinking in Greek life definitely has social value—it is
relaxing, fun, and opens you to new ideas and new people. The issue arises when
the line is drawn between drinking to meet people and meeting people to drink.
In larger society, drinking just to be drunk is heavily frowned upon, but in
the Greek system, it is totally accepted—different contexts mean different
attitudes and mindsets (just like murder in the Louis CK clip!). Our chapter
looked at how we are approaching drinking at this present moment—do we drink to
be social, or are we social so we can drink?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> So in your life,
where does context define what it alright and what is not alright? Are there
things you view differently based on who you are with or where you are? I know
for me, it can be hard sometimes to see how different contexts—such as my
Christian groups and my fraternity—can overlap, intersect, or intertwine.
Ultimately, it seems consistency in your beliefs is key, but perhaps that is
the real challenge: consistency through context. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> Peace.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
Tyler "Dazz" Daswickhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03275267111192809648noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4469998399417341322.post-19183725610878039262014-02-04T21:00:00.000-07:002014-02-10T13:39:37.485-07:00Louis CK Bible Study Week 1 Recap: God is Like a Shitty Girlfriend<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhRY5qxJQGmzSRQpWxiYAis2k7x396huYKcN0pqvRCKTJCQGW3FfAhHLOabaZOpSwm3CJaBfelb7ZOxv3txKHjmIthqrA5jTMrQ7QXEwRtX4ecSSr4XTL-IPBBTd-dSG90h8JxsJa-bNnoE/s1600/jesus-meme-abraham-and-isaac1.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhRY5qxJQGmzSRQpWxiYAis2k7x396huYKcN0pqvRCKTJCQGW3FfAhHLOabaZOpSwm3CJaBfelb7ZOxv3txKHjmIthqrA5jTMrQ7QXEwRtX4ecSSr4XTL-IPBBTd-dSG90h8JxsJa-bNnoE/s1600/jesus-meme-abraham-and-isaac1.png" height="320" width="257" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">The first thing you can do is enjoy the weekly Jesus meme.</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> Welcome back,
friends! This is the kickoff of <i>God is
Like a Shitty Girlfriend</i>—we are excited to have you.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 15.333333015441895px;"> Alright, first thing you have to do is check out this week’s clip. This one is from the first season of Louis CK’s Emmy-winning television show </span><i style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 15.333333015441895px;">Louie.</i><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 15.333333015441895px;"> </span></div>
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<object class="BLOGGER-youtube-video" classid="clsid:D27CDB6E-AE6D-11cf-96B8-444553540000" codebase="http://download.macromedia.com/pub/shockwave/cabs/flash/swflash.cab#version=6,0,40,0" data-thumbnail-src="https://ytimg.googleusercontent.com/vi/Z520qVpx_OU/0.jpg" height="266" width="320"><param name="movie" value="https://youtube.googleapis.com/v/Z520qVpx_OU&source=uds" /><param name="bgcolor" value="#FFFFFF" /><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true" /><embed width="320" height="266" src="https://youtube.googleapis.com/v/Z520qVpx_OU&source=uds" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowfullscreen="true"></embed></object></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> Pretty awesome,
right? For those of you who had trouble with that clip, Louis CK discusses the
story of Abraham and Isaac. It helps if you have the actual Bible passage to go
with it, so here is that too.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<div class="chapter-2" style="background: white; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in;">
<span class="chapternum"><b><u><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;">Genesis 22 </span><o:p></o:p></u></b></span></div>
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<span class="text"><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;">Some time later God tested</span></span><span class="apple-converted-space"><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;"> </span></span><span class="text"><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;">Abraham. He said to him,
“Abraham!”<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="chapter-2" style="background: white; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in;">
<span class="text"><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;">“Here I am,”</span></span><span class="apple-converted-space"><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;"> </span></span><span class="text"><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;">he replied.</span></span><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div style="background: white; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in;">
<span class="text"><b><sup><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;">2 </span></sup></b></span><span class="text"><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;">Then God said, “Take your son, your only son, whom you
love—Isaac—and go to the region of Moriah.</span></span><span class="apple-converted-space"><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;"> </span></span><span class="text"><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;">Sacrifice him there as a burnt
offering</span></span><span class="apple-converted-space"><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;"> </span></span><span class="text"><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;">on a mountain I will show you.”</span></span><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span id="en-NIV-551"><span class="text"><b><sup><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;">3 </span></sup></b></span><span class="text"><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;">Early the next morning</span></span><span class="apple-converted-space"><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;"> </span></span><span class="text"><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;">Abraham got up and loaded his
donkey. He took with him two of his servants and his son Isaac. When he had cut
enough wood for the burnt offering, he set out for the place God had told him
about.</span></span></span><span class="apple-converted-space"><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;"> </span></span><span id="en-NIV-552"><span class="text"><b><sup><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;">4 </span></sup></b></span><span class="text"><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;">On the third day Abraham looked up and saw the place in the
distance.</span></span></span><span class="apple-converted-space"><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;"> </span></span><span id="en-NIV-553"><span class="text"><b><sup><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;">5 </span></sup></b></span><span class="text"><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;">He said to his servants, “Stay here with the donkey while I and
the boy go over there. We will worship and then we will come back to you.”</span></span></span><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div style="background-color: white; background-position: initial initial; background-repeat: initial initial; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span id="en-NIV-554"><span class="text"><b><sup><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;">6 </span></sup></b></span><span class="text"><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;">Abraham took the wood for the burnt offering and placed it on his
son Isaac,</span></span><span class="apple-converted-space"><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;"> </span></span><span class="text"><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;">and he himself carried the fire and the knife.</span></span><span class="apple-converted-space"><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;"> </span></span><span class="text"><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;">As the two of them went on
together,</span></span></span><span class="apple-converted-space"><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;"> </span></span><span id="en-NIV-555"><span class="text"><b><sup><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;">7 </span></sup></b></span><span class="text"><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;">Isaac spoke up and said to his father Abraham, “Father?”</span></span></span><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span class="text"><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;">“Yes, my son?” Abraham replied.</span></span><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span class="text"><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;">“The fire and wood are here,” Isaac said, “but where is the lamb</span></span><span class="apple-converted-space"><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;"> </span></span><span class="text"><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;">for the burnt offering?”</span></span><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span id="en-NIV-556"><span class="text"><b><sup><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;">8 </span></sup></b></span><span class="text"><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;">Abraham answered, “God himself will provide</span></span><span class="apple-converted-space"><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;"> </span></span><span class="text"><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;">the lamb</span></span><span class="apple-converted-space"><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;"> </span></span><span class="text"><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;">for the burnt offering, my son.”
And the two of them went on together.</span></span></span><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div style="background-color: white; background-position: initial initial; background-repeat: initial initial; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span id="en-NIV-557"><span class="text"><b><sup><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;">9 </span></sup></b></span><span class="text"><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;">When they reached the place God had told him about,</span></span><span class="apple-converted-space"><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;"> </span></span><span class="text"><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;">Abraham built an altar</span></span><span class="apple-converted-space"><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;"> </span></span><span class="text"><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;">there and arranged the wood</span></span><span class="apple-converted-space"><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;"> </span></span><span class="text"><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;">on it. He bound his son Isaac and
laid him on the altar,</span></span><span class="apple-converted-space"><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;"> </span></span><span class="text"><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;">on top of the wood.</span></span></span><span class="apple-converted-space"><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;"> </span></span><span id="en-NIV-558"><span class="text"><b><sup><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;">10 </span></sup></b></span><span class="text"><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;">Then he reached out his hand and took the knife</span></span><span class="apple-converted-space"><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;"> </span></span><span class="text"><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;">to slay his son.</span></span><span class="apple-converted-space"></span><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;"> </span></span><span id="en-NIV-559"><span class="text"><b><sup><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;">11 </span></sup></b></span><span class="text"><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;">But the
angel of the</span></span><span class="apple-converted-space"><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;"> </span></span><span class="small-caps"><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt; font-variant: small-caps;">Lord</span></span><span class="apple-converted-space"><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;"> </span></span><span class="text"><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;">called out to him from heaven,</span></span><span class="apple-converted-space"><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;"> </span></span><span class="text"><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;">“Abraham! Abraham!”</span></span><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;"></span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div style="background-color: white; background-position: initial initial; background-repeat: initial initial; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span class="text"><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;">“Here I am,”</span></span><span class="apple-converted-space"><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;"> </span></span><span class="text"><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;">he replied.</span></span><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div style="background-color: white; background-position: initial initial; background-repeat: initial initial; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span id="en-NIV-560"><span class="text"><b><sup><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;">12 </span></sup></b></span><span class="text"><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;">“Do not lay a hand on the boy,” he said. “Do not do anything to
him. Now I know that you fear God,because you have not withheld from me your
son, your only son.”</span></span></span><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div style="background-color: white; background-position: initial initial; background-repeat: initial initial; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span id="en-NIV-561"><span class="text"><b><sup><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;">13 </span></sup></b></span><span class="text"><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;">Abraham looked up and there in a thicket he saw a ram</span></span><span class="apple-converted-space"><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;"> </span></span><span class="text"><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;">caught by its horns.</span></span><span class="apple-converted-space"><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;"> </span></span><span class="text"><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;">He went over and took the ram and
sacrificed it as a burnt offering instead of his son.</span></span><span class="apple-converted-space"></span><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;"> </span></span><span id="en-NIV-562"><span class="text"><b><sup><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;">14 </span></sup></b></span><span class="text"><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;">So
Abraham called</span></span><span class="apple-converted-space"><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;"> </span></span><span class="text"><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;">that place The</span></span><span class="apple-converted-space"><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;"> </span></span><span class="small-caps"><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt; font-variant: small-caps;">Lord</span></span><span class="apple-converted-space"><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;"> </span></span><span class="text"><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;">Will Provide. And to this day it
is said, “On the mountain of the</span></span><span class="apple-converted-space"><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;"> </span></span><span class="small-caps"><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt; font-variant: small-caps;">Lord</span></span><span class="apple-converted-space"><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;"> </span></span><span class="text"><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;">it will be provided.”</span></span></span><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div style="background-color: white; background-position: initial initial; background-repeat: initial initial; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span id="en-NIV-563"><span class="text"><b><sup><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;">15 </span></sup></b></span><span class="text"><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;">The angel of the</span></span><span class="apple-converted-space"><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;"> </span></span><span class="small-caps"><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt; font-variant: small-caps;">Lord</span></span><span class="apple-converted-space"><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;"> </span></span><span class="text"><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;">called to Abraham from heaven</span></span><span class="apple-converted-space"><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;"> </span></span><span class="text"><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;">a second time</span></span></span><span class="apple-converted-space"><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;"> </span></span><span id="en-NIV-564"><span class="text"><b><sup><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;">16 </span></sup></b></span><span class="text"><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;">and said, “I swear by myself,declares the</span></span><span class="apple-converted-space"><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;"> </span></span><span class="small-caps"><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt; font-variant: small-caps;">Lord</span></span><span class="text"><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;">, that because you have done this and have not withheld your son,
your only son,</span></span><span class="apple-converted-space"></span><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;"> </span></span><span id="en-NIV-565"><span class="text"><b><sup><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;">17 </span></sup></b></span><span class="text"><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;">I will surely bless you</span></span><span class="apple-converted-space"><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;"> </span></span><span class="text"><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;">and make your descendants</span></span><span class="apple-converted-space"><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;"> </span></span><span class="text"><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;">as numerous as the stars in the
sky</span></span><span class="apple-converted-space"><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;"> </span></span><span class="text"><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;">and as the sand on the seashore.</span></span><span class="apple-converted-space"><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;"> </span></span><span class="text"><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;">Your descendants will take
possession of the cities of their enemies,</span></span><span class="apple-converted-space"></span><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;"> </span></span><span id="en-NIV-566"><span class="text"><b><sup><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;">18 </span></sup></b></span><span class="text"><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;">and
through your offspring</span></span><span class="apple-converted-space"><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;"> </span></span><span class="text"><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;">all nations on earth will be blessed,</span></span><span class="apple-converted-space"><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;"> </span></span><span class="text"><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;">because you have obeyed me.”</span><o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div style="background: white; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in;">
<span class="text"><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;"> In Delta Chi Bible Study, we do a little
something called the “Quick and Dirty” after our silent reading, in which we
summarize the passage in a very quick and dirty fashion (come on, you are
reading a Bible study written for fraternity dudes, what did you expect?). So
in that tradition, here is the Quick and Dirty on Genesis 22.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div style="background: white; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in;">
<span class="text"><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;"> God asks Abraham to kill his son Isaac, and surprisingly,
Abraham agrees. He takes his son up to the top of a mountain, and is all set to
kill him when God steps in again, praises Abe’s faithfulness, and promises him
numerous descendants and a great legacy as a reward. <o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div style="background: white; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in;">
<span class="text"><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div style="background: white; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in;">
<span class="text"><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;"> Not super complicated, but it does raise a
lot of questions.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;">1.<span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: 7pt;">
</span></span><!--[endif]--><i><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;">Why would
Abraham agree to just up and kill his son like it is no big deal?</span></i><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div style="background: white; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in; margin-left: .5in; margin-right: 0in; margin-top: 0in; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -.25in;">
<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;">2.<span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: 7pt;">
</span></span><!--[endif]--><i><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;">Why does God
double-back on himself?</span></i><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div style="background: white; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in; margin-left: .5in; margin-right: 0in; margin-top: 0in; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -.25in;">
<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;">3.<span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: 7pt;">
</span></span><!--[endif]--><i><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;">What does
this mean for God and Abraham going forward? God and everyone else going
forward?</span></i><span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div style="background: white; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in;">
<br /></div>
<div style="background: white; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;"> We can go through these one at a time. For
the first question, our group found it very strange that the Bible would omit
any sort of internal struggle that Abraham was feeling when God gave his
orders. Seems like it would make for some good drama, right? Unfortunately, the
Bible is sometimes pretty bad at giving us any sort of look into these people’s
feelings, and in this case, it seems particularly strange to leave it out. The
best answer the Delta Chi brothers could come up with here was straight-up
faith. The dude trusted God <i>so much</i>
that he believed in His plan all along. Never wavered once—even Louis CK
thought it was nuts.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div style="background: white; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;"> Let’s skip to the third question (we can
come back to the second one in a minute). The promise at the end of the passage
is a pretty huge deal. God is basically telling Abraham that his countless
descendants are going to blessed with power, land, and influence for hundreds
and hundreds of years to come. It promises that God is going to be there the
whole time, making sure things go alright. It is another one of those “Chosen
People” moments for the father of Judaism (begs the parallel: is Abraham the
LeBron James of the Bible? Vested with great power, but both struggled early—LeBron
did not win a Finals for many years, and Abraham did the whole “screw your
plans, God, I’ll have sex with whoever I want” thing back in Genesis 16—then they
both made some great moves to Miami and a life of faithfulness, respectively,
and they now enjoy lives atop the NBA/father of three religions—I’d buy that).
Anyway, the deal with the covenant was to show how insightful God was about
this whole thing. If he is going to make a promise that big, he needs to know
he can trust Abraham.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div style="background: white; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;"> The elephant in the room, however, is why?
Why even have this test at all? Just like Louis CK said, it was pretty shitty
of God to psyche old Abe out like that—what was the point? Abraham had already
been faithful for many years (again, except for Genesis 16—that pretty much
sucked for everyone). The Delta Chi brothers proposed something interesting:
what if God was doing some clever foreshadowing here?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div style="background: white; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;"> The climax of the Bible, to Christians, is
the story of the Christ found in Matthew, Mark, Luke, and John. Essentially,
this is the story of a sacrifice—God sacrificed His son Jesus to save humanity,
just as Abraham was all set to sacrifice his son as well. We cannot imagine what
Abraham went through while he was carrying Isaac up the mountain, and I think
it is fair to say that when God looked down on Jesus as he was being nailed to
the cross, it was not all sunshine and lollipops up in heaven. Was God trying
to explain how significant the Christ sacrifice would be through the plight of
Abraham? Definitely makes for some interesting parallels between the Old
Testament and the New Testament.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div style="background: white; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;"> <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div style="background: white; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;"> Let’s bring it back to the clip. Regardless
of the Jesus tie-in, it still seems pretty extreme of God to ask a grown man to
murder his son. Louis CK was right, it is very shitty-girlfriend-esque to go
back and forth like that. No one likes a waffling God, after all. But what the
DX Bible Study found last week is that this “shitty girlfriend” attitude can be
extended to a lot of things in our lives. For us, it was our fraternity. Why
would you go the extra mile for something that admittedly lacks a ton of immediate
affirmation and acknowledgement? Likewise, it seems silly to chase after God
all the time when the result can be so intangible.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div style="background: white; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;"> The thing is, God always has your back in
the long run, just like our bible study decided that DX always has our backs in
the long run. This house gives back what you put into it, and the more you put
into it, the better your experience will be, so even the times when you wash
the dishes alone or make a grocery run unannounced can end up paying dividends.
Upstairs, God is working to pay those dividends for you even when you might not
be ready to thank Him for it. In that way, maybe God is not such a shitty
girlfriend after all.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div style="background: white; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;"> We challenged ourselves to think about the
things in our lives that we approach with the “shitty girlfriend” attitude, and
we sought to turn those into positives by thinking about the future dividends
in store for us. In our house, our chapter, Northwestern—whatever. Good things
have been promised to each of us, and with the Big Guy in the Sky, it will
definitely be worth it.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div style="background: white; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;"> Peace.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div style="background: white; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in;">
<br /></div>
<br />
<div style="background: white; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt;"> <i>Next
week in the Louis CK series: You Have to Clean Up Your Kids When You Kill Them. </i><o:p></o:p></span></div>
Tyler "Dazz" Daswickhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03275267111192809648noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4469998399417341322.post-1762920081224089322014-02-03T17:45:00.001-07:002014-02-03T17:45:11.598-07:00When A Dog Dies<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 10pt; line-height: 115%;"> My sister and I sat
on the couch and did our best not to make a noise. We clamped our hands over
our mouths and our eyes squeezed shut and you could barely hear the sound of
stifled laughter escape from between our fingers. We were in hysterics.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> In front of us,
resting on her favorite mat, our dog Junie was having a dream.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> Junie B. Jones had
always had the prime piece of napping territory in our house—a big, white,
cushy mat plopped smack in the middle of our living room. She loved her mat.
She would sleep on it all day if she could, and sometimes, when she found time
amongst watching three noisy kids and two other dogs, she would have a dream
during her snooze. These dreams were pretty darn funny.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> Junie was always
running in her dreams. She would pump her legs and grit her teeth and try so
hard to just <i>go go go.</i> It was
absolute comedy to us kids, sitting nearby and squeezing pillows to our faces
until one of us just could not take it anymore and belted out a huge laugh,
waking Junie immediately and causing her to rise up and wheel around to check
if we were alright.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> We always felt bad
then; we never wanted to wake her up.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> We loved Junie a
lot. She died last week after 15 years of being the World’s Greatest Pet.
Fifteen years for a boxer—that is a pretty long time. It is enough time for a
dog to become your best friend, best secret-keeper, best pillow, best kitchen
buddy, best backyard pal, and best
I-want-to-be-alone-but-I-want-someone-to-talk-with confidant. The perfect pet.
There was no one better.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> To be honest, there
are not too many times in a college kid’s life when you want to go home, but
last week, I really wanted to go back to Junie. Sitting in the hallway of your
dorm with your sister on the phone makes you feel far away from a lot of
things, especially the idea of your furry friend finally saying goodbye. The funny
thing is, it never occurred to me that Junie needed me—it just occurred to me
that I needed Junie. I needed a warm hug and a gentle tongue licking my hand
and a dry nose twitching up toward my face and two big old eyes wondering why I
was crying. In my hour of need, I wanted my dog. I know my sisters felt the
same way, and my mom and dad too. We are all really different people, but we
all had one best friend—the dog that used to smash and crash through the house
when she was a lanky puppy, and the dog that used to go room to room every
morning as a good old friend, just to make sure we were each waking up alright.
Junie was so good, so loving—she treated us like we were a part of her family.
I hope she felt like a part of our family too.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> The hardest thing
to imagine is the empty space. A bowl on the kitchen floor without food in it.
The spot in front of the window vacant. A favorite mat sitting lonely in front
of the couch. The space under the table big and hollow—no one there to sneak
scraps of tortilla or smuggle bits of hot dog. Two other dogs missing their
friend as well. These things have always come along with Junie. She has been
watching after our house for 15 years—ever since we picked her up out of that
cardboard box and decided to take her home.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhjQ5GdeQpYnMRRYwlKC75LVEhlL7nAbkXbKyIe1MUShYDsjdPrXdm21F1nkvP1SfOAaDDutkSO_s7hEG93hSWSCGIWsAcOaAoIC5hB5lWNXXhS8gxtE89ATHa02Vl7vGwiwsuaZCaFzKwg/s1600/IMG_0495.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhjQ5GdeQpYnMRRYwlKC75LVEhlL7nAbkXbKyIe1MUShYDsjdPrXdm21F1nkvP1SfOAaDDutkSO_s7hEG93hSWSCGIWsAcOaAoIC5hB5lWNXXhS8gxtE89ATHa02Vl7vGwiwsuaZCaFzKwg/s1600/IMG_0495.JPG" height="320" width="240" /></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> Coming home used to
be easy, because you had a welcoming committee of three crazy dogs, with Junie
as the chief coordinator of all the festivities. Now, I cannot imagine what the
summer will be like, and walking through that door and not seeing the best
friend I ever had coming over to just remind us that <i>Don’t worry, I remember. </i>It feels impossible.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> Say what you will
about heaven, but I know that God has a special place for all of our best
friends. He has a special place for dogs who were loyal, and loving, and
gentle, and happy all the time. He has a special place where Junie can have
another bone, and go on another walk, and take another nap, because in heaven no
one cares if you pooped on the carpet or ate a sock or shed all over Mom’s
favorite chair. In heaven, Junie can do whatever she wants, because that is
what you are allowed to do when you take such good care of people.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiPSUolOmPy_g7QBXjXCHTUwrs5FfGagIgx2ba9wAAniM4lCbd6Q4Gcg4xHhOMrkbIFKG5r7C4CYGH15MqEVvmV2zIJO9Pza2qvLvnYK7zsg-PaDcS2BbZtXsrPvF213slbpcqnSfnIi6wD/s1600/IMG_1617.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiPSUolOmPy_g7QBXjXCHTUwrs5FfGagIgx2ba9wAAniM4lCbd6Q4Gcg4xHhOMrkbIFKG5r7C4CYGH15MqEVvmV2zIJO9Pza2qvLvnYK7zsg-PaDcS2BbZtXsrPvF213slbpcqnSfnIi6wD/s1600/IMG_1617.JPG" height="320" width="180" /></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> On the day when
Junie would die, I asked my father if she was alright. He sent me a picture of
her. She was looking right at the camera, calm and peaceful and wise and
knowing, and right underneath the photo, my dad wrote, “A-ok.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> That is all you
need to know—Junie is A-okay now. I can see her running somewhere, probably
chasing some sneaky rabbit or squirrel, and she is so happy and so excited.
A-okay. Just running and running and running—she does not have to dream about
it anymore.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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Tyler "Dazz" Daswickhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03275267111192809648noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4469998399417341322.post-90386408829256397872014-01-20T15:55:00.003-07:002014-01-20T15:55:40.998-07:00God is like a Shitty Girlfriend: Introducing the Craziest Bible Study Ever<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi3kkX2SvP3KnJWgQ4h4_rvfPbOHlTnPiFecBl0WUgsr2Do5JDexsZAaReiHxp0csyrXnue2FatGHAMVwgMZS7rw3qZLyqwAO4RRxIRp3cBBxq_918_f7adRgqWqY7jRupOhvo2zLd75E5K/s1600/louis-ck-oh-my-god.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi3kkX2SvP3KnJWgQ4h4_rvfPbOHlTnPiFecBl0WUgsr2Do5JDexsZAaReiHxp0csyrXnue2FatGHAMVwgMZS7rw3qZLyqwAO4RRxIRp3cBBxq_918_f7adRgqWqY7jRupOhvo2zLd75E5K/s1600/louis-ck-oh-my-god.jpg" height="280" width="400" /></a></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"><br /><br /> Back in September,
my brother Kit Fox and I were sitting across from each other and talking about
how we were crappy leaders. We sure were right.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> Last spring, Kit
and I had attempted to lead a bible study in our fraternity. Just scrape
together a group of guys every week and discuss the best-selling book in the
world. Casual. Loose. Maybe a little too loose. The prep meetings that Kit and
I would schedule for the week would turn into ten-minute recaps right before
the study was set to begin. Upon our input, the discussions we were leading
would die like plants we had sprayed with pesticide. Every meeting felt like we
had shot ourselves in the foot—again and again. It sucked.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> It was time to
reevaluate. The truth was, Kit and I were not keeping each other accountable,
and this distinct lack of commitment was killing our bible study. We had
nothing to be excited about, so we knew that to make this better, we had to find
something to be excited about. Facing each other last September, this thing
arrived. We had it.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> Kit and I were
going to write our own bible study, and we were going to base it around the
comedy of Louis CK, the rudest, most cynical, most hilarious comic we could
think of. We love Louis CK, our fraternity loves Louis CK—it is a crazy idea,
but that could be what makes it so great.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> Now, it is
important to note that Louis CK is not simply a ruse to make people show
up—quite the opposite, in fact. Each week’s takeaway revolves around a certain
bit or interview from the man’s comedic repertoire. We are actually using him
as a discussion tool—a springboard into deep, meaningful conversation about the
Bible. Believe it. We watch a clip, read the scripture passage, and then build
the bridge between the two. Crazy.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> The ultimate goal,
however, is the same as it was when Kit and I were stumbling our way through
last spring: we want to show our brothers that Greek life has space for
religion. After all, if the (brilliant) comedy of Louis CK has room for a
religious discussion, Delta Chi must have room for it too. All are welcome,
anyone can share whatever they feel, no matter their background or history or
religious opinion. We just want to talk, and watch some great comedy while we
are at it.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> So with that, let’s
kick off the craziest bible study ever conceived. Introducing the Kit and Dazz
original: <b>God is like a Shitty
Girlfriend: <i>Talking about the Bible with
Louis CK. </i></b>An eight-part series about all the awesome things the Bible
has to say, as told by a comedian who says in our very first clip, “If there
was a God, that dude was an asshole.” <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> It is going to be a
really fun ride, friends. Just be sure to buckle up. With what is heading your
way, it is best to be ready for anything.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
Tyler "Dazz" Daswickhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03275267111192809648noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4469998399417341322.post-60523501262966545852013-12-31T18:46:00.001-07:002013-12-31T18:46:40.141-07:00James Franco vs. The Wolf vs. Mind Control Worms: The Top 10 Flicks of 2013<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhNVfWV-Hgec5EtuvK8WJdfeQoAXezpXwdVtyxREltyLTXEoxTMf0UJS24HvQu9BY0gPIrhTiC1jEC5Zjl0fuStK-TTnV_fax4awo_5_MUhb6kPjO2qcbDIDfZ9DC6BAi4JQuBWSS0TP4Ny/s1600/wolf.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="273" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhNVfWV-Hgec5EtuvK8WJdfeQoAXezpXwdVtyxREltyLTXEoxTMf0UJS24HvQu9BY0gPIrhTiC1jEC5Zjl0fuStK-TTnV_fax4awo_5_MUhb6kPjO2qcbDIDfZ9DC6BAi4JQuBWSS0TP4Ny/s400/wolf.jpg" width="400" /></a></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"><br /></span></b></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"><br /></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> </span></b><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;">Have you seen enough of these
yet? I certainly have not, and that is why Dazz is back with the annual Top 10
Flicks of the Year: 2013 Edition. This is one of my favorite articles to write,
so strap in and let’s roll. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> Right away, it is
apparent that the back half of the year was bloated with quality flicks, mostly
dramas, and now, these late bloomers have infected top ten lists like the
plague. I mean, a lot of this is for good reason—in fact, half of Dazz’s own list
was released within the last two months—but sheesh, when everyone’s list is
drama after drama, it can grow pretty old.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> When the According
to Dazz staff thinks of 2013, we think of a year where more and more people had
the chance to be heard. We think of a year where more types of people were
represented and supported than ever before. We think of a year that was diverse
in its expression and style. As a result, the Top 10 Flicks list strove to
reflect that. There were tons of good movies this year, spanning all genres,
and in true 2013 style, we want you to know about the cream of the crop in all
of these niches.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> So without further
ado, the best films of 2013. Let’s bring it all home, friends.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;">10.
Frozen<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> It was the best
Disney flick since Tarzan in 1999—easy. The characters were delightfully
original, the humor continually on-point, and the music was some of the best
since the Lion King. Sure, the story might have been plugged up with a few of
the all-too-convenient Disney clichés, but the company took another huge step
forward by injecting their classic princess formula with a more modern feel.
The characters were some of the most interesting and multi-dimensional
personalities that we have seen in an animated movie, and they were well-served
by a mature, yet universal thematic approach. <i>Frozen</i> will soon be a Disney classic—it is that impressive.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;">9.
Upstream Color</span></b><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> Some might be
turned off by the convoluted presentation, but make no mistake, <i>Upstream Color</i> is a
technically-brilliant and surprisingly-poignant achievement in film. This is
the sophomore outing for writer, director, and lead actor (!) Shane Curruth,
and can be considered a grounded sci-fi of sorts, one that explores the concept
of mind control in a way that simply has not been considered before. The film’s
highly-limited release and distinct lack of exposition might make it seem
unapproachable (indeed, background reading and plot summaries are almost
mandatory), but when the work is done, something highly-memorable emerges. This
is Dazz’s hidden gem of 2013, so head over to Netflix (it is available to
stream!) and give it a watch. It will punish your brain and warp your mind, but
you will be hard-pressed to forget it.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;">8. This
is the End<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> Say what you will,
but the funniest movie of the year deserves a spot in the Top 10. In a year
when the idea of the celebrity exploded into even more absurd proportions, it
was hysterical to see a group of A-listers who were finally willing to laugh at
themselves. The whole thing feels like a giant inside joke that everyone can be
in on, and every scene from the Exorcism of Jonah Hill to the debate over the
Milky Way completely delivered. What is more, this one boasts a surprising
amount of re-watchability, ultimately setting it apart from the other comedies
of 2013. Hilarious, self-aware, and totally appropriate for the times we live
in, <i>This is the End</i> is money. And can
you beat that ending? No way.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;">7.
Inside Llewyn Davis</span></b><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> While other movies
on this list (as we will later see) did well in conjuring more tangible
emotion, <i>Inside Llewyn Davis</i> hit me
the hardest several hours later, when I found myself still thinking about the
powerful songs, the beautiful imagery, and the marathon of hard knocks endured
by the title character. It was a stirring reminder of the loftiness of our
dreams, and how, quite simply, things might not always work out. The Coen
Brothers add another stellar flick to their canon of exceptional movies, and
this one above all others might do best to represent the everyman. Exploring
the 1960s folk scene alongside Llewyn Davis was a gloomy ride, but thanks to
some powerful acting by leading man Oscar Isaac, incredible cinematography and
art direction, and <i>the best soundtrack of
2013</i>, retrospect tells me that I absolutely loved it. The more I think
about it, the more I like it. Give me a week and it might crack the Top 3 on
this list—seriously.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;">6.
Gravity<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> In a year full of
“breakout” or “career-defining” performances, Sandra Bullock’s turn in <i>Gravity</i> might just top them all. She was
nothing short of spectacular in this one; even more impressive when you
consider that she is in just about every scene. Many will call it the most
beautiful movie of the year, and for good reason, because <i>it looks like this movie was actually shot in space. </i>Couple this
with the sweeping, lingering, I-refuse-to-cut-away-and-give-the-viewer-a-break
direction of Alfonso Cuar</span><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman";">ó</span><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;">n and
you have a movie that forces you to the edge of your seat and keeps you there.
The opening collision sequence (an awe-inspiring uncut shot clocking in at
nearly 15 minutes) will go down as one of the most jaw-dropping moments of the
year. A visual and technical treat, this one will give film-nerds and casual
viewers equal satisfaction. At its core was an incredibly riveting experience.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;">5.
Captain Phillips</span></b><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> My only gripe is
that the title sucks. In no way does it make you want to see the movie—a damn
shame, because this was one of the best thrillers of the year, and (buckle up) <i>Tom Hanks’ best performance since Cast Away</i>
(way back in 2000!)<i>.</i> Both of those
aside, however, the real star of this show was Barkhad Abdi and his turn as the
Somali captain Muse. More so than many biopics, <i>Captain Phillips</i> truly tells you all sides of the Somali pirate
story, and the result is a showcase of talent on both sides of the globe. We
receive as much of a look into the lives of the Africans as we do the
Americans, and that is not something many Hollywood movies are doing today. At
its core is a tight, tense, and utterly captivating flick, but in a greater
sense, this is the benchmark of how America should handle “based on a true
story”-type movies. Oh, and did I mention that the ending features a
military-ops scene that rivals that of <i>Zero
Dark Thirty</i>? Believe it.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;">4.
Prisoners<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> Let me spew some
critical crap at you before we come to the real reason this movie is so great.
First off, the performances are powerful, affecting, and grounded. The
direction is tight and ideal for a thriller. Finally, the storyline and plot
structure is rife with twists that truly and effectively pay off.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> But here is the
real reason that <i>Prisoners </i>is so high
on this list: it was far and away the best in-theater experience this year (and
maybe in many years). A movie about two kids being kidnapped is tense enough,
but when this one begins to explore the desperation of the victimized parents,
things ramp up to a face-covering, eye-widening, mouth-smothering level of
intensity. People in our theater just started crying out loud when they could
not take it. Someone screamed. You felt everyone squirm in unison during
particularly impactful scenes—no one was ever relaxed during the whole
two-and-a-half-hour runtime. My friend Emily and I had our jackets balled up to
our faces for at least half the movie, and I was so tense that I was sore
afterward. Going to see <i>Prisoners</i> was
a movie-theater experience unlike anything else, and if that is not the sign of
something great, I just do not know what is.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;">3. 12
Years a Slave<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> </span></b><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;">Yup, sorry—it is not number
one. Here is the thing: <i>12 Years</i>
really is a great movie. It is brilliantly well-done, and it conveys its
message so effectively that it is impossible not to leave the theater in
reflection. It was one of the most difficult movies I have ever seen, and I
will probably remember the shocking brutality and emotional payoff for a long
time, but the kicker is this: it was impossible to enjoy, and ultimately, that
is why I go to the movies.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> I am not saying
that <i>12 Years</i> is overrated—it is not.
It is probably essential viewing for anyone seeking to understand the root of
one of the worst evils our nation has ever had. It will probably win Best
Picture. It was phenomenal—but it sucked to watch. I go to the movies to be
entertained and to watch a great story being told, and while <i>12 Years</i> told an incredible story, I was
far from entertained. I walked out feeling worse than when I went in, and the
result is that I probably will never watch it again. It was just too much. It
was great—everyone should see it—but it was not the best movie of the year. I
want to be able to watch the top movie over and over again and always enjoy the
experience.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;">2. The
Dallas Buyers Club</span></b><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> All hail the indie
movie! Many will argue that smaller production companies have had better years
than the Hollywood bigwigs, and <i>The
Dallas Buyers Club</i> is the pinnacle of why that is. Matthew McConaughey
gives the performance of his career as an HIV-afflicted man who resorts to
drug-smuggling and membership deals as a way to not only bring the best
treatment to himself, but to all others with HIV as well. The result is a
fascinating and engrossing look into the time in America was HIV was still the
“gay disease,” and McConaughey (along with Jerod Leto in an award-worthy turn
as his transvestite business partner) delivers the moments that convince you
that this story needs to keep being told. One of the most quietly-disturbing
points of social division in America is brought to light by a story that, while
underscoring this issue, also succeeds in telling something inspiring,
uplifting, and triumphant. We have a sense of the larger social issue that
existed, but are also encouraged by the man who was one of the first to defy
it. <i>Dallas Buyers Club</i> is poignant
and effective in all the right ways, and with the two best acting performances
of the year behind it, it tells its story brilliantly.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpFirst" style="margin-left: 0in; mso-add-space: auto;">
<b><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;">1. The Wolf of Wall Street<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="margin-left: 0in; mso-add-space: auto;">
<b><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> </span></b><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;">But
let’s cut the crap here. Only one movie this year was captivating, hilarious,
and wholly-entertaining from beginning to end, and you are damn right that it
was the crass, irreverent, and middle-finger-throwing <i>Wolf of Wall Street. </i>As a group of overly-rich and powerful
stockbrokers, Jordan Belfort and the Gang cheat their way up the white-collar
ladder to a land of such utter debauchery that many will be shocked and
appalled, but all will revel in the epic amount of stick-it-to-the-man-style
activity that ensues. Leonardo DiCaprio has his best shot at an Oscar ever with
his masterful comedic and dramatic performance as the title character, and the
supporting cast (the ever more reliable Jonah Hill notwithstanding) does well
to bolster the laughs. Many will be turned off by the absolutely insane amount
of sex, drugs, and profanity in this one (truly, at times it serves more to
detract from the proceedings), but upon some review, it seems that the
excessive amount of . . . excessiveness, I guess, is a total reflection of the
characters. Just like its leading man, <i>Wolf
of Wall Street</i> sees its biggest fault in the rampant amount of crassness
that it explores, but the degree of self-reference makes up for it.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpLast" style="margin-left: 0in; mso-add-space: auto;">
<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> At the end of the day, you have the most
entertaining movie of the year, and its three-hour runtime feels far from
drawn-out. Like anything effectively edgy and line-crossing, you keep watching
the spectacle just to see what sort of mischief the characters will undergo
next. The list of standout scenes goes on and on—the FBI questioning on the
yacht, a certain drug overdose, the lunch with Matthew McConaughey (he’s
everywhere!), the “sell me this pen” scene . . . this is another killer
addition to director Martin Scorsese’s collection of morally-sketchy crime
movies. If you want something purely memorable, in ways that are sometimes
good, sometimes bad, and always entertaining, look no further than <i>Wolf. </i>It is the best movie of the year.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;">Honorable
Mentions:<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;">The World’s End—second-best comedy of the year, excellent
humor and a zany plot, all-star British cast, best of the Three Flavours
Cornetto Trilogy<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;">Out of the Furnace—revenge flick that chooses subtlety over
the typical enraged violence, great performances by Christian Bale and Woody
Harrelson, good cold opening, memorable ending <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;">Fruitvale Station—deeply moving flick about the San Fran
shooting just a few years ago, powerfully acted by Michael B. Jordan, very
thought-provoking<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;">Man of Steel—best superhero movie of the year, interesting
and original take on Superman, quit you bitching about the over-the-top
destruction, because the action was sweet<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;">American Hustle—incredibly acted, but left off the list
because of a poorly-written ending and a distinct lack of emotional payoff, a
few little changes would have made it truly great<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;">Place Beyond the Pines—best performance of Ryan Gosling’s
career, but a just-okay final act fails to live up to the incredible first half
of the movie, great message on the nature of legacy<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;">See you fools in 2014,<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;">--Dazz<o:p></o:p></span></div>
Tyler "Dazz" Daswickhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03275267111192809648noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4469998399417341322.post-29354104541412635122013-12-23T14:11:00.000-07:002013-12-23T21:34:45.659-07:00Alone in the Dark: Why Gone Home is the Best Entertainment Experience of 2013<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjO6r8azGbYP62W4hYJF5-r7Fpi6Hlfr5FIENrCw2l6E7V36uNinav7UVh8knKe-xfHEaRQuqGhREePu85o3pL0rEHZXPSN6OQKD8Deo-f111avbEVkuGqFIE3l8jF0uLZmoyzrnxuK4nH-/s1600/13997-b.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="182" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjO6r8azGbYP62W4hYJF5-r7Fpi6Hlfr5FIENrCw2l6E7V36uNinav7UVh8knKe-xfHEaRQuqGhREePu85o3pL0rEHZXPSN6OQKD8Deo-f111avbEVkuGqFIE3l8jF0uLZmoyzrnxuK4nH-/s400/13997-b.png" width="400" /></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> We have all had
moments in our lives when we come home to an unexpectedly empty house. The
lights are off, everything is quiet save for the mechanical hum of the fridge,
your room is dark—few things are as irrationally unsettling or disturbing as an
abandoned home, but that is exactly what <i>Gone
Home</i> has presented, and that is why it is not just the best videogame of
the year, it is one of the most memorable media experiences I have had in a
long time. Everyone should play it.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> The premise is
simple: you play from the perspective of a college-aged girl who comes home
after a trip abroad to find her house completely and utterly abandoned. Not
just empty—abandoned. Your little sister has left a note on the front door
begging you to not tell Mom and Dad what happened, and the voicemail you left
from the airport is still on the machine, presumably unheard. From there, you
are free to explore the house however you want, and unravel exactly what has
happened while you were gone.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> All you can do as
Katie, the older sister, is walk around the house, read papers, and pick up
objects to examine them, but that is all you need to do. You see, with this
simple premise comes a surprising amount of freedom—you can act exactly how you
would in real life. For example, right away I decided to run upstairs and check
my little sister’s bedroom, in response to the note she left behind. Of course,
to tell you what I found there would ruin the story, but just know that the
more you explore the house, the harder it will be to explore the house.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> That is because <i>Gone Home</i> masterfully plays on our own
fears, both rational and irrational. A flickering light at the end of the hallway
could mean faulty wiring, or it could mean . . . well, something else. At the
same time, opening the door to your father’s office could reveal the answer to
one of your many questions, but that answer could be something terrifying. It
makes for an all-too-tangible feeling of fear and suspense—all of the scares
come from your own realm of possibility, and it can turn simple actions into
giant feats of willpower. Indeed, the hardest thing I had to do in <i>Gone Home</i> was turning on the light in
the basement. The darkness, so often your enemy in videogames, was now my ally,
just because it was hiding the secrets I was not sure I wanted to reveal. I can
still remember hovering over the switch.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> As further
testament to the grounded atmosphere, everything in <i>Gone Home</i> carries an immense feeling of tangibility. It feels like
a family lives in this house. Things not meant to be seen by visitors, like the
inside of a storage closet, are decidedly less neat and organized than those
things out in the open. Additionally, things that carry more history to them,
like a favorite book or magazine, look more worn and used than others. Even the
hobbies and pastimes of your family members are fully-realized, whether that is
evidenced in a crude art studio upstairs, or in the numerous <i>X-Files </i>episodes (recorded on VHS) lying
around the television set. This feels like a real family, and as you delve more
into each member’s public and private life, it becomes impossible not to care
about them.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> And that,
ultimately, is what makes <i>Gone Home </i>such
a memorable experience. The stories you uncover dare to explore themes about
family, love, and belonging that other forms of media (books and movies
included) regularly shy away from. It looks at things that we experience in our
own lives every day, and as you journey onward through the house, you realize
that this could just as easily be your family. These could be your parents or
your sister. I can tell you with complete honesty that I cared more about the
characters in <i>Gone Home </i>than I have
cared about any videogame character before. Simply put, I felt connected to
them, and I do not think that is something I have ever been able to say about a
game before. As I explored the house, I was simply reminded of my own.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> The final result
was something lasting, impactful, and profoundly moving. You might attribute it
to the unique way I could relate to the story, but the truth is that <i>Gone Home</i> simply has a way to reach
everyone. This is not about some superhuman action hero saving the world; this
is about people who seem real, dealing with problems that actually are.
Everyone can play it because everyone can connect to it, just as I did. It is a
prime example of what videogames can be—a wholly interactive method of
meaningful, emotional storytelling. It is not a game for “gamers” or
“non-gamers;” it is a game for everyone.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> The story, setting,
and characters of <i>Gone Home</i> all
combine to make it one of the most memorable personal entertainment experiences I had
in 2013. It strikes chords with the player that no game ever has, and it is one
of the most essential videogames out there. It is $10 right now on their website—download it. I
will remember my journey through the house for the rest of my life, and you
will be hard-pressed to forget it as well.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> Deep, poignant, and
profound, <i>Gone Home</i> is an incredible
feat of storytelling. Without a doubt, piecing together the dark mystery of its
host family will stay with me for years to come.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
Tyler "Dazz" Daswickhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03275267111192809648noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4469998399417341322.post-52567390352658364392013-12-15T21:15:00.001-07:002013-12-15T21:16:24.917-07:00The Queen's Subjects: Why Beyoncé Fans are Ruining Beyoncé<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgthgajirzahUrWxw6oz-avGIk4zv454wS05cP3ALk1yk6GYVq2BKPSr3VNzAKIO01yJXic5zw5SN8xPdPINNo275NWRPLNwwaMtS5KPoO9EM3aSqz2bcF6gQXM7_mIpk02UXfbaTDiqjKq/s1600/beyonce4.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgthgajirzahUrWxw6oz-avGIk4zv454wS05cP3ALk1yk6GYVq2BKPSr3VNzAKIO01yJXic5zw5SN8xPdPINNo275NWRPLNwwaMtS5KPoO9EM3aSqz2bcF6gQXM7_mIpk02UXfbaTDiqjKq/s320/beyonce4.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
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<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> Hold it right
there.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> This is not an
article saying that Beyoncé is bad. This is not an article saying that Beyoncé
is overrated, or not as good as her fans think she is, or not deserving of the
crown our popular culture has placed upon her head. Beyoncé has done incredible
things for the pop industry, and currently stands as one of the single most
marketable, impressionable, and influential artists in music today. I am not
saying Beyoncé is not fantastic.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> I am just saying
that those who love her most are also destroying her.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> Now, I need you to
know what side of the tracks I am coming from. I would consider myself someone
who simply <i>appreciates</i> Beyoncé—I would
not say I am a fan. When her fifth studio album dropped this weekend (in a
pretty badass way—under the cover of darkness), I was not one of the first to
listen to it. I still have not listened to it. I think I come from a place that
fully understands the empowerment, the strength, and the serenity that Beyoncé
represents, and while I appreciate it and think she does really great things, I
will not pay to see her live or to listen to one of her albums.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> Now, if you have a
problem with that, keep reading, <i>because
this was written just for you.</i><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> In the wake of (or
leading up to) important Beyoncé news, there tends to be a very specific kind
of reaction. Obviously, people can become a little excited, which is normal.
After all, if my favorite artist was about to perform live or had dropped a new
single, I would be pretty pumped as well. I have no problem with people being
excited for Beyoncé. They are fans—that is what they are supposed to do—but fans
of the “Queen of Pop” tend to take things to another level.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> A comparison: about
a week ago I found myself in a discussion with a good friend about the merits
of Kanye West as a musician. I said that from what I had heard, I did not see
why Kanye was that great, so my friend encouraged me to check out <i>My Beautiful Twisted Dark Fantasy</i> and <i>Watch the Throne</i>—two of Kanye’s most successful
albums. I did, and while I was able to grant some merits to his producing
abilities, I still found his lyrics lacking, and when I reported back to my
friend, he accepted it and we went off down our different paths of musical
taste.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> When you tell
someone you do not like Beyoncé, something different happens. You see, the
excitement that people garner around Beyoncé events begins to transform into
something exclusionary and competitive. Beyoncé is God, Beyoncé. Albums. Are.
Everything., going to her concerts become religious experiences, and let’s not
forget, her daughter is so cute that the fans “can’t even.” There is no one
more perfect in the universe, and if you dare disagree, then you are stupid, an
idiot, or a r*tard. Your opinion is invalid because it is not just wrong, it is
downright blasphemy.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> As for your adverse musical tastes? Well,
according to many of her fans, the moment Beyoncé comes onto the scene, it is
like <a href="http://www.gif-king.com/files/uSers/gif-king-29aff435515cc3e90617f42050f34a25.gif" target="_blank">Vince Carter doing the double-windmill 360 in the Slam Dunk Contest</a>. That
is, it’s over. Your preferences, doomed from the start, were (according to the Twitter account below, courtesy of Buzzfeed) just “s*** on,” or thanks to <a href="http://s3-ec.buzzfed.com/static/2013-12/enhanced/webdr02/13/10/anigif_enhanced-buzz-7986-1386949694-0.gif" target="_blank">this gif</a>,
wiped completely off the table. Your tastes were not wrong because Beyoncé put
out something better, they are wrong just because they were not Beyoncé to
begin with. Pretty much a no-win situation for those who choose not to follow
the doctrine of Mrs. Knowles-Carter.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> The worst thing
about all of this is that it takes the figure of Beyoncé, one of the most
influential women in our popular culture, and turns her into something people
want no part of. Instead of Beyoncé-news being something we can all be excited
about, the whole thing becomes a strangely repellant phenomenon. It is
exhausting for a non-Beyoncé-fan to go online and see all of the talk and all of
the hype and screaming and OMGs and comparisons to queens and Gods and Jesuses
and perfection. It feels like everyone joined a hyper-aggressive cult, and you,
the heathen non-believer, are stuck on the outside looking in. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> Does this not defy
everything Beyoncé is trying to say with her music? This is a woman who stresses
empowerment, strength, and self-security with her songs, but her fans, with
their caps-lock ravings and their cries of worship, are counteracting these
exact messages. How are young people supposed to be secure with themselves if a
large part of social media is telling them that Beyoncé is rendering their
opinions worthless?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> It is perfectly
alright for fans of the world’s biggest pop diva to be excited about her
accomplishments—no one can blame them for that. Problems arise, however, when
the discipleship to Beyoncé turns hostile and obnoxious—it does not make people
want to join them in their following. They should practice what their fearless,
independent, irreplaceable leader preaches, and help her to help others feel
just as confident in themselves as she makes them feel. The music world would
be a better place for it.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> And hey, it would
sure make the Queen proud.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
Tyler "Dazz" Daswickhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03275267111192809648noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4469998399417341322.post-51713455521160155212013-12-08T19:42:00.001-07:002013-12-08T20:35:28.301-07:00The 10 Best Space Jam Mash-ups You Can Find On The Internet<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiNGUa48p8Lj8zEKcTV7iFD_xc41OiWSMXgWgT2X13H9qRLDFUcmMPXxGzkByEsaJeKMZ-aHRbhC9vse_PUxfxjIdzLQ8_mnveYJ9fhq-HG6ZKGO7q92oFVK5Fajnld7khdXjDztm_cR6br/s1600/soundtrack.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiNGUa48p8Lj8zEKcTV7iFD_xc41OiWSMXgWgT2X13H9qRLDFUcmMPXxGzkByEsaJeKMZ-aHRbhC9vse_PUxfxjIdzLQ8_mnveYJ9fhq-HG6ZKGO7q92oFVK5Fajnld7khdXjDztm_cR6br/s320/soundtrack.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> I take this job
seriously. I really do. But sometimes, the Internet just plain wins. It takes
something seemingly unimportant and insignificant and transforms it so that it
simply demands my attention. As a result, fine pieces of journalism such as
this are born.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> What I want you to
understand, as a prelude to all that you are about to experience, is that this
is no half-assed, thrown-together, copy-and-paste crap in list form. No.
Rather, over two dozen prime candidates for this particular Top 10 were
considered. The research was extensive. The analysis, with excellent
contributions from Dylan “Roommate of the Year” Rogers, was critical and
definitive. No expense was spared.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> Why <i>Space Jam</i> though? Well, as one of the
most consistently-excellent and time-resilient phenomena of the 1990s childhood
era, the movie deserves an article in its own right, but when you factor in the
sheer strength of the cult following that continues to this day, it is clear
that you have something special on your hands. If you ask me, the flick is
nothing without that great theme song. It is catchy, memorable, and perfectly
in line with the movie’s terrific cool-fun tone. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> No further
introduction is needed. Sometimes, the Internet just does magical things, and
the best that we can all do is sit back and listen. Ladies and gentlemen, the
Top 10 Space Jam mash-ups that your browser can find.<o:p></o:p></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> Just click the links and discover greatness.</span></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;">10.
<a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dLoU0bgYOaU&feature=youtu.be" target="_blank">Space Space Jam Jam (Quad City DJs vs. Quad City DJs)</a><o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> Our list starts out
with a pure blend of the classics. That is right: the <i>Space Jam</i> theme blended with the <i>Space Jam</i> theme. Essentially, the artist just laid one version of
the song over the other, but you cannot deny that the result does a fantastic job
of a) still being really darn catchy, and b) maintaining the integrity of the
original. There might not be a lot of points for creativity here, but things
still sound great.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;">9. <a href="https://soundcloud.com/muhlurs/radioactive-slam" target="_blank">Radioactive Slam (Quad City DJs vs. Imagine Dragons)</a><o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> The pounding bass
of the Imagine Dragons tune blends surprisingly well with the more
snare-centric Quad City groove, which adds great contrast. Credit to the artist
for doing an actual mix of both songs rather than falling for the lazy
tack-them-on-top-of-each-other trap. Bonus points are awarding for that great
tagline: <i>I feel the slam in my bones.</i>
It might be higher on this list if it was not for poor use of <i>Radioactive</i>’s terrific inhale effect in
the first verse—you expect something great here, but it ends up muddled in the
background. Lame.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;">8. <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fPC5y2gHWO4" target="_blank">Slam Me Barkley (Quad City DJs vs. Carly Rae Jepsen)</a><o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> I will admit it,
the opening is a tad weak, but the song quickly grows on you as you keep
listening (this might be helped a little bit by the hilarious Photoshop-job of
Chuck’s face on top of Carly Rae’s, but credit where credit is due). Things
really hit their stride when <i>Call Me
Maybe</i> contributes that infectious six-note string segment in the chorus—it meshes
well with the verses in the <i>Jam</i> song.
Would be a tad better if some Carly Rae vocals were added in to give some
contrast, but at the very least you have something creative to be found here.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;">7.
<a href="https://soundcloud.com/drofnasleinad/r0cket-sauce-bittersweet" target="_blank">Bittersweet Slamphony (Quad City DJs vs. The Verve)</a><o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> At first, the
slowdown is off-putting, but this is truly the best mixing we have seen on this
list thusfar. The artist switches up the tempo, highlights certain bass notes
during transitions, and blends the vocals of each song in excellent fashion.
The Verve sounds great sped-up, and the long stretches of <i>Bittersweet Symphony</i> that highlight the crooning oohs and ahhs of
lead singer Richard Ashcroft blend well with the raps of C.C. Lemonhead. Yes,
that is one of the Quad City DJs, thanks for asking.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;">6.
<a href="https://soundcloud.com/dwsampson/harder-better-slammer-jammer" target="_blank">Harder Better Slammer Jammer (Quad City DJs vs. Daft Punk)</a><o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> Seems natural,
right? Well, it is. Major props to this artist for the incredible blending of
Daft Punk’s infectious four-word chorus with the lyrics of the Space Jam theme.
So far, this is easily the most dance-ready mash-up we have seen. The verses
give you a terrific straight beat, while the chorus provides for solid
freeze-frame potential. Oh, and the breakdown at the 3:00 mark takes the whole
thing to another level. We are entering the cream of the crop with this one.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;">5.
<a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nKB9PprbaQw&feature=youtu.be" target="_blank">Dunkytown (Quad City DJs vs. Lipps Inc.)</a><o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> Did you hear that
opening build?! Amazing! This is truly what this list is all about—an effective
mash-up that uses real creativity. It would have been easy to just tack on the <i>Funkytown</i> keyboard riff onto the Space
Jam theme, but no. This artist did a killer job of combining the classic verses
of <i>Space Jam</i> with the <i>Funkytown</i> chorus. This is easily the
most exciting song on this list so far, the problem is that it is just too darn
short. Finish strong, YouTubers!<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;">4.
<a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cou9_NHQTpQ&feature=youtu.be" target="_blank">Washington Wizards in Winter (Quad City DJs vs. Trans-Siberian Orchestra)</a><o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> It is time to stop
messing around. Here is far and away the most inventive mash-up on this list. A
classic Christmas tune meets a classic 90s flick—who would have thought? The
best thing about this particular combination is that it takes an orchestra,
meshes it with a hip-hop tune, and then creates something that is headbangingly
good. A new genre out of two entirely different genres! It is surprising in the
absolute best way. And the closing forty seconds are absolutely epic. The made <i>Space Jam</i> sound huge.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;">3. <a href="https://soundcloud.com/addison_born/bill-slam-the-science-jam" target="_blank">Bill Slam the Science Jam (Quad City DJs vs. Bill Nye)</a><o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> Sometimes great
artists hone their craft for years and years until they reach perfection, but
sometimes you just catch lightning in a bottle. Ladies and gentlemen, here is a
fine example of the latter. <i>How the hell
does this work so well?! </i>I cannot even say for sure—maybe it has something
to do with the crowd yelling “Bill! Bill! Bill! Bill!” in the background while
the Space Jam crowd responds to C.C. Lemonhead’s shouts for the Na-na-nas. The
mixing is especially strong in the second half of the song, but I am sure you
know that already. Science rules.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;">2. <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BwBK2xkjaSU" target="_blank">My Slam Will Jam On (Quad City DJs vs. Celine Dion)</a><o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> When I was playing
this back for myself as I wrote this paragraph, I still cracked up. I have
listened to it a solid eight times now, and it is still consistently hilarious.
The combination is so unexpected, yet so brilliant, that there is no choice but
to just sit and enjoy it. You wonder why Celine Dion never borrowed the <i>Space Jam</i> groove to begin with—it takes
her pop-ballad and makes it clubby and beautiful and dance-worthy all at once.
A major highlight of this one is also the build-up to the climactic final
chorus around the 3:20 mark. Creativity level: expert. It has been an honor
slamming with you.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;">1. <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iBIf0OgZffU" target="_blank">Carry on Wayward Slam (Quad City DJs vs.Kansas)</a><o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> Give me a second, I am still applauding.
What an amazing tune. This mash-up with one of the most well-known classic rock
songs out there took a lot of guts and a lot of heart, but this artist totally
had what it takes. The levels of each tune are perfectly balanced, we can hear
all the <i>Space Jam</i> lyrics without
drowning out the numerous face-melting guitar solos from Kansas. I also am a
total sucker for the quick cut-outs with the “Don’t you cry no more!” wailings,
but the best part is easily hearing the Space Jam crowd burst into applause as
the piano kicks off the opening verse (around 1:00). Flat-out gives you chills,
and whoever thought the Space Jam tune could do that?! This is the perfect
blend of two wildly-different tunes, and it works to absolute perfection. This
is why the Internet exists. What a way to go out.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> Slam
on, friends. Slam on.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
Tyler "Dazz" Daswickhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03275267111192809648noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4469998399417341322.post-55462512072065020102013-12-03T14:50:00.002-07:002013-12-03T14:51:09.594-07:0012 Great Kinda-Christmas Movies You Have An Excuse To Watch Now<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> This started out as
a Christmas-movie top-10 list (that’s right—<i>Christmas-movie</i>.
Quit your moaning. The next time there is a Hannukah-movie, you call me), but
some problems kept arising. These often came in the form of: <i>Well, Nightmare Before Christmas is great
and all, but is it really a better movie than Die Hard? No. Not even close. But
can you count Die Hard as a Christmas movie? Some might, but purists might not.
The movie takes place on Christmas Eve. Is that reason enough? This is stupid.
I love Die Hard. I want it on this list.</i> and so on. So I scrapped that
idea. Sometimes, one movie is just better than another, no matter how Christmas-y.
So here is the new column—movies that you can kind of sort of count as holiday
flicks, but they are so freaking good that there is no excuse <i>not</i> watch them around this time of year.
The bottom line: this is my blog and I can do what I want. So without further
ado, here are the best kinda-Christmas-movies to watch this year—though
unconventional, no one will protest these around the fireplace this year.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<b><span style="color: #00b050; font-size: 18.0pt; line-height: 115%;">Die Hard</span></b><span style="color: #00b050; line-height: 115%; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> The most common
flick thrown into the not-a-Christmas-movie-but-totally-should-be debate, <i>Die Hard</i> combines a Christmas-party
setting with what is quite simply one of the top-three action movies of all
time. Bruce Willis is never better, the action scenes are rugged, gritty, and
tense, and Alan Rickman as the leading terrorist is nothing short of a genius
casting move. The Christmas tone is evident throughout, so feel free to wrap up
with a blanket and a plate of cookies as you watch John McClain strap some C4
to an office chair and send it down an elevator shaft. ‘Tis the season, indeed.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<b><span style="color: #00b050; font-size: 18.0pt; line-height: 115%;">Rocky IV</span></b><span style="line-height: 115%; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> You have opened the
presents. You have eaten the brunch. You have shooed the in-laws out of your
living room and posed for all of the footie-pajama pictures that you can
handle—now what is there to do on this bright Christmas morning? Easy—watch the
greatest boxing match to ever take place on December 25<sup>th</sup>. That is
right, the legendary bout between Rocky Balboa and the Soviet behemoth Ivan
Drago took place on this exact day, and if you want to honor one of the great
American triumphs of our time, then it would serve you well to watch <i>Rocky IV</i> once things wind down in the
gift-giving department. What better way to spread holiday cheer then to see Sylvester
Stallone beat it into the juiced-up communists across the Pacific? Honor the
anniversary of our Savior’s birth by honoring the defeat of all that is evil
and anti-American. God bless us, everyone.</span><span style="line-height: 115%; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<b><span style="color: #00b050; font-size: 18.0pt; line-height: 115%;">Cast Away</span></b><span style="line-height: 115%; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> Let’s tone it
back—we have had a lot of fighting and explosions and good vs. evil so far, so
let’s take a breather. Instead, we should turn to a movie where one man loses
everything he has and struggles to maintain his spirit as he is marooned alone
on an island for four years. Yes, <i>Cast Away</i>
is perfect for replicating that Christmas feeling where we all really
understand the value of everything we have, because in <i>Cast Away</i> we watch Tom Hanks as he is flushed down the proverbial
toilet. Plus, all of Tom’s woes start on Christmas Eve! He even wears an ugly
sweater in the beginning! When you throw in the trials of Wilson (Hanks’
unforgettable volleyball companion), you even have some great friendship themes
for good measure. Just a great holiday movie, period.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<b><span style="color: #00b050; font-size: 18.0pt; line-height: 115%;">Step Brothers</span></b><span style="line-height: 115%; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> What do you mean, <i>Cast Away</i> bummed you out?! Tommy Hanks’
breathing speech at the end is incredible! Sheesh, well thank goodness <i>Step Brothers</i> gives us one of the best
comedic Christmas scenes of all time with their fantastic sleepwalking segment.
Additionally, since we have already been through the themes of friendship, the
triumphs of the American way, and overall ass-kicking, it only seems
appropriate that we go into the realm of family. Most of us have those siblings
that make us want to bury them alive, and most of us have those siblings that
make us want to go do karate in the garage together. Therefore, <i>Step Brothers</i> is the perfect holiday
movie—we will laugh, argue, tear each other’s hair out—it is just like the real
thing! Plus, it will appeal to other holidays too—even the Hanukkah people are
welcome, because we have plenty of fertilizer!<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<b><span style="color: #00b050; font-size: 18.0pt; line-height: 115%;">The Bourne Identity</span></b><span style="line-height: 115%; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> Ok, look, here is
the deal: at some point in this movie you kind of see some Christmas lights in
the background, and there’s generally snow on the ground, and . . . and . . .
it is just an awesome movie, alright? Jesus, if the movie takes place around
Christmas, that is reason enough, and <i>The
Bourne Identity</i> gives us some of the greatest chase scenes, cat-and-mouse
moments, and car sequences in the last 20 years, so I think its inclusion is
more than justified. Highlights include Matt Damon being a superspy and killing
people with a fountain pen. Merry Christmas, you filthy animal.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<b><span style="color: #00b050; font-size: 18.0pt; line-height: 115%;">Ben-Hur</span></b><span style="line-height: 115%; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> You want a real
Christmas movie? Coming right up. The full name of this flick is actually <i>Ben-Hur: A Tale of the Christ</i>, and it
stands as one of the most acclaimed movies of all time (it is actually tied
with <i>Titanic</i> and <i>Return of the King</i> for the most Academy Awards ever). While the
large brunt of the movie revolves around our main man Judah Ben-Hur undertaking
awesome action scenes, such as the infamous chariot race, or dealing with some
shifty Roman leaders in some truly great moments of intrigue, the flick is
bookended by what is essentially the Jesus Christ Highlight Reel—namely, his
birth and death/sacrifice. This is the movie that introduced the world to the
“epic” genre, and is the reason we have sprawling cinematic masterpieces like <i>Lord of the Rings</i>, <i>Gladiator</i>,<i> </i>or <i>Schindler’s List</i> today. Not only do you
find a purely excellent movie experience here, but you also have one of the
best depictions of the Christmas Story ever put to the screen. It is
three-and-a-half hours very well-spent.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<b><span style="color: #00b050; font-size: 18.0pt; line-height: 115%;">Lethal Weapon</span></b><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> Hold on, everyone.
Mel Gibson’s upset. He is upset that <i>his</i>
story of the Christ did not make this list. Well, here is the deal, bub, while <i>Passion of the Christ</i> is a great flick,
it is definitely more of an Easter movie. For the holiday season, audiences are
much better off turning on his timeless buddy-cop flick <i>Lethal Weapon.</i> After all, there is that quality Christmas dinner
scene when (the secretly racist) Mel goes over to Danny Glover’s house. Aside
from that, however, you have one of the best buddy-cop movies of all time,
complete with incredible one-liners and fuzzy friendship themes. Plus, you have
one of Mel’s all-time greatest hairstyles with the shaggy mane-mullet combo. It
is terrific fun—perfect for the holidays.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<b><span style="color: #00b050; font-size: 18.0pt; line-height: 115%;">The Entire Harry Potter
Series</span></b><span style="color: #00b050; font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="color: #00b050; font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> </span><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;">Consider
this—all of the times when you wanted to be at Hogwarts, when you <i>really</i> wanted to be at Hogwarts, were
during all of the Christmas scenes. The Great Hall lined with tree after tree.
The bang of wizard crackers echoing through the corridors. Warming up by the
common-room fireplace with a Weasley sweater. Heading out to the frozen lake to
ice-skate or to have magical snowball fights. Hogwarts is truly at its most
fanciful and inspiring around Christmastime, when the snow lends a new sense of
wonder and imagination to us, the readers, year in and year out. What better
way to ring in the holidays, and Christmas especially (Makes me wonder—how many
people celebrated Hanukkah at Hogwarts? The faculty certainly didn’t, and it
was never evident if there were any Jewish characters), than to join our
favorite wizards on one of the most beloved, sprawling, incredible sagas of our
time? There is a reason ABC Family does this every year—it just fits. The
Potter series will take you back to being that little kid on Christmas morning,
or . . . or Hanukkah night, I guess. I just wish my presents came from an owl.
So much.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<b><span style="color: #00b050; font-size: 18.0pt; line-height: 115%;">Kiss Kiss Bang Bang</span></b><span style="color: #00b050; font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="color: #00b050; font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> </span><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;">Robert
Downey Jr. opens this detective-movie-satire by telling the audience that he is
going to share the story of what happened last Christmas, and thus launches one
of the funniest action movies of the 2000s. This one holds the kinda-Christmas
genre a little more securely than the others on this list—lead actress Michelle
Monaghan (very underrated in the looks department, by the way) wears a skimpy
Santa outfit for a good stretch of time, and there is even a Christmas-themed
party scene, where Val Kilmer offends a bunch of barely-clothed females. If it
all sounds absurd, that is because it totally wants to be. <i>Kiss Kiss Bang Bang </i>is Downey Jr.’s best movie, hands-down. It
would be criminal to not include it in your holiday marathon. Funny, tense, and
chock full of smart intrigue and zany hijinks. Watch it.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<b><span style="color: #00b050; font-size: 18.0pt; line-height: 115%;">The Godfather</span></b><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> What are the
holidays without a slew of back-stabbing betrayal? Aside from being right up
there with (or even above) <i>Ben-Hur</i> as
one of the best movies ever made, <i>The
Godfather</i> contains some truly great Christmas-centric scenes. This is, of
course, in addition to its phenomenal casting, intricate plot, and numerous
twists and turns. With the baptism scene, the numerous holiday-centered mob
hits, and the church segments aplenty, this flick will definitely coax a
Christmas mood out of you. Duvall, Pacino, Brando, Keaton . . . there is a heck
of a lot to love here. Plus, all those classic mob moments will certainly give
you a ton of ideas to deal with those in-laws. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> Just kidding. That
was twisted. Forget I said it. Seriously.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<b><span style="color: #00b050; font-size: 18.0pt; line-height: 115%;">First Blood</span></b><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> Let’s end where we
started, shall we? Just pure, unbridled ass-kicking—you gotta love it. In the
first Rambo movie, you have Sly Stallone (He appears twice on this list! Wow!)
going into a remote town, at Christmastime of course, and taking some names as
a badass Vietnam veteran. He sets some traps, uses a chain-gun, and makes some
crazy cliff jumps—all part of the holiday tradition for Rambo, and it can be a
part of your holiday tradition too. Sure, are the real Christmas themes totally
present? No, but you do see some lights at one point, right before the gas
station blows up, so it counts. Plus, with a low body-count and some
interesting PTSD themes running throughout, this is an old-school action movie
that manages to deliver on the badassery and originality alike.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<b><span style="color: #00b050; font-size: 18.0pt; line-height: 115%;">Catch Me If You Can</span></b><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> However, we have to
close out our list with the movie that might just have the best
Christmas-in-a-non-Christmas-movie-scene in recent memory. It comes with the terrific
chase flick <i>Catch Me if You Can. </i>First
off, it just would not be Christmas without Leonardo DiCaprio—fact. Second off,
this list did not have enough Tom Hanks in it—fact. Third off, this movie
brings the drama, the laughs, the sheer entertainment, and yes, it brings the
Christmas. One of the numerous high points of this one revolves around the
holiday, when FBI agent Tommy Hanks, cops in tow, finally corners Leo the Con Artist at his house (don’t worry, the movie is full of flashbacks and flash-forwards, so
this spoils nothing). In the background (and eventually the forefront), one can
hear the classic tune. That is right—it is A Christmas Song.<br /><br /><br /><br /><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<iframe allowfullscreen='allowfullscreen' webkitallowfullscreen='webkitallowfullscreen' mozallowfullscreen='mozallowfullscreen' width='320' height='266' src='https://www.youtube.com/embed/vZ0ka4d-T2I?feature=player_embedded' frameborder='0'></iframe></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
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<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> One of the best
scenes in crime movies is accompanied by one of the best carols. It is simply
the best pure Christmas scene out of any movie on this list. Other flicks might
present Jesus in an exceptional way, or include a well-adorned tree in the
background, but <i>Catch Me If You Can</i>
takes the cake for its purity and simplicity. When you watch that scene, it
feels like Christmas, and it feels pretty damn good.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
Tyler "Dazz" Daswickhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03275267111192809648noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4469998399417341322.post-17573865223140130162013-10-04T19:35:00.002-07:002013-10-04T19:35:47.842-07:00One in Ten-thousand: Getting Northwestern Pumped for Ohio State<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiu8lnwzXa8K27Ot3aemsr19Q1XjHXMSqnTDUthU_D1TPIjvTZzmB7_OASauRSf_MhiHRPYGiL1ff5jV4leRyTt6Cyu9sm9r5TDZlhqnLOHASwU_ERua7PX_tL2DdgsSVbRlu3N0IMSS8NA/s1600/Student-section-packed-vs-NEB-2012.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="266" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiu8lnwzXa8K27Ot3aemsr19Q1XjHXMSqnTDUthU_D1TPIjvTZzmB7_OASauRSf_MhiHRPYGiL1ff5jV4leRyTt6Cyu9sm9r5TDZlhqnLOHASwU_ERua7PX_tL2DdgsSVbRlu3N0IMSS8NA/s400/Student-section-packed-vs-NEB-2012.jpg" width="400" /></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> One in
ten-thousand. That is all it takes.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> It is the single
best unspoken sports law of all time: the law of 1 in 10,000.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> It goes like this:
in a given sports scenario, the most certain of outcomes will happen 9,999
times out of 10,000. The hail marys will be swatted to the ground, the
half-court shots will fall short, and the final batter will ground out and fail
to score the tying run. Time and time again, these edge-of-glory moments never
materialize, dreams are vanquished, and the world settles back to its boring,
disappointing normalcy.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> But every now and
then, a single spark of fate catches fire, and the sports world is treated to
something so unforgettable that these moments live on in the depths of time. Giants
fall, national pride is won, and small-town heroes find themselves immersed in
more lights and fanfare then they ever could have imagined. One time in
ten-thousand, something amazing happens.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> For this game
against Ohio State, many have written off the Wildcats. “What’s Northwestern?”
is a common phrase I have seen from B1G fans, in addition to all of the talk
about our Wildcats preparing uselessly for the Buckeye steamroller. More fans,
a bigger stadium, a wider pool of talent, a world-renowned coach, a tradition
of winning and success—it does not quite add up to a lot of folks believing in
a Northwestern win this weekend. Even talking to my father over the phone, I
heard an earful of “Don’t get too excited man, Ohio State is so damn good.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> Sounds like the
perfect set-up, right?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> The idea of the 1
in 10,000 has kept fans in their seats since the beginning of athletics. There
is always a chance for a miracle—nothing is scripted, nothing is set in stone,
and even the largest favorite can be vulnerable. Against the juggernaut that
has been, and is, the Ohio State University, little old Northwestern does not
appear to have too great of a chance, but nothing is certain. This is arguably
the best gang of Wildcats in twenty years, and if any team can seize this
moment and shock the sports world, it is this one. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> That is why, on
this Saturday, it is okay to believe. It is okay to expect the unexpected. It is
okay to put every ounce of your Wildcat passion into this game. We live and die
by these moments of sheer, unbridled, irrational belief. We keep screaming and
shouting because we never know when this next moment will be <i>the one in ten-thousand</i>. We never know
when everything will click and the stars will align and the pieces will fall
into place and the miracle, the do-you-believe-what-I-just-saw moment of
ecstasy and celebration, will happen.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> That is why, right
now, in the wee hours of the night, these Wildcats lie awake with thoughts of
an upset on their minds. This is a place that believes in its peers, believes
in their abilities, and believes that through all of the claws and screams and
move-the-chains and Go Cats!, we have the chance to be that 1 in 10,000—all of
us. We have the chance to do something great, and no matter how small that
chance may seem to outsiders, to us, it is all we need.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> So dream on,
friends. Imagine that Rebecca-Crown clock tower glowing purple in the night,
standing tall and proud over the shouts and cheers echoing down Sheridan Road.
Imagine Ryan Field, always a place not quite big enough, packed with the
larger-than-life presence of victorious Wildcat fans. Imagine the shock and the
awe and all of the pulse-pounding, chest-clutching, breath-snatching agony that
might bring us there. Just for right now—imagine. You can see it all.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> Restless nights
like this are why we love this school. All of the close calls and heart attacks
have been leading up to this. We have stayed loyal and true to our Wildcat
family year in and year out, and now, on the eve of one of the biggest games
this incredible place has ever seen, we owe it to ourselves to believe just one
more time. Win or lose, we can hold our heads high when it is all over, because
we never quit on our Cats, just like they never quit on us.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> If you played out this game ten-thousand
times, OSU might win 9,999 of those contests. But you know what? That does not
have to be this game. This game could be it; this game could be the one.
Because tomorrow the Ohio State Buckeyes are going to see the real Northwestern,
and the real Northwestern is far more than just the guys who hit the grass.
Anything—<i>anything</i>—can happen. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> This is what we have been waiting for. It's time to go Cats.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
Tyler "Dazz" Daswickhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03275267111192809648noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4469998399417341322.post-76941798975780177382013-09-24T13:58:00.002-07:002013-09-24T13:58:25.024-07:00A Must-See: Why Everyone Needs to Witness the WWE Live and In-Person<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEivmU_4BAko21hWEW0rKUf5h1QRbF-ew8HXrNv8VLp2DyonrnUpEV7Sq9aCYWZHwC5k2se9C4VnVyh-rmS-dqq_IQI6VZp66cVyraMNGDcErX2R_S4DURuIJBy6czCELvsw5qb4z6_hKQT9/s1600/20130529_Light_WWEReturnToChicago_HOMEPAGE.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="223" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEivmU_4BAko21hWEW0rKUf5h1QRbF-ew8HXrNv8VLp2DyonrnUpEV7Sq9aCYWZHwC5k2se9C4VnVyh-rmS-dqq_IQI6VZp66cVyraMNGDcErX2R_S4DURuIJBy6czCELvsw5qb4z6_hKQT9/s400/20130529_Light_WWEReturnToChicago_HOMEPAGE.jpg" width="400" /></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> Last night I stood
in the top row of the 18,000-person Allstate Arena and watched CM Punk charge a
grown man in an electric wheelchair and proceed to smash his face in. It was
just another week on the World Wrestling Entertainment’s <i>Monday Night RAW.</i><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> For the uneducated,
the weekly drama that ensues on <i>RAW</i>
is a televised wrestling affair. It travels from city to city, and culminates
each month in an absolutely swashbuckling pay-per-view event, whether it is <i>Hell in a Cell </i>or <i>Summer Slam</i> or the legendary <i>Wrestlemania.</i>
The world of professional wrestling is dynamic, engrossing, and a downright
riot. Sure, you can watch all of the action on the small screen, but going to a
live show is not only a must for fans, it is a necessity for enthusiasts of sports,
theater, and drama alike.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> Chances are you
have been channel-surfing at some point or another and have stumbled across pro
wrestling. You might have glimpsed a jump from the ropes or a knee to the
stomach or one of the many glorious finishers toted by each fighter. You saw
the oversized muscles and the huge fireworks and the loud entrance music, and
you probably kept on flipping. Fine. Live your life. Wrestling certainly has a
niche that it looks to fill, but what you might not realize is that the niche
is bigger than you think—the sport (yeah, read it again—<i>sport</i>) has something to offer pretty much everyone, and when you go
and see it live and in person, it all becomes readily apparent.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> The most apparent
thing about going to a WWE event is easily the crowd—there is no other audience
like it. Picture the two or three most passionate fans you have ever witnessed
at a football game or baseball game, etc. Now, take that insane degree of
fandom and apply it to <i>every single one</i>
of the thousands of people in attendance at a wrestling match. It is nothing
short of incredible to be in an arena with 18,000 people who know all of the
celebrations, all of the chants, all the right times to cheer, all the right
times to boo—there is no other environment like it. No matter who emerges from
the tunnel—it could be the reigning world champ or a lowly tag-team—everyone freaks
out as soon as that entrance music plays. The crowd knew that hometown hero CM
Punk was going to emerge before his face even appeared on the big screen, they
just heard Living Colour’s “Cult of Personality” and began screaming for the
Chicagoan. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> And it’s not just
rabid twenty-year-old dudes in there, either. Little kids holler for John Cena,
grizzled old-timers lead the way on the classic call for Rob! Van! Dam!, and
the little chubby Mexican mother in the row in front of me even clapped and
cheered to support her fellow countryman Alberto Del Rio. Everyone has a
favorite, everyone has the heroes (and villains) that they root for, and
everyone just gives being a fan all that they have. It is contagious in a way
that you just will not understand until, like me, you suddenly find yourself
joining in with thousands of other people in Daniel Bryan’s
kinda-lame-kinda-not “Yes!” chant. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> Of course, with the
crowd bringing their A-game week in and week out, it would only fit that the
wrestling is on par. In short, it totally is. Look, the fact that it is all
choreographed and fake is obvious, but once you put that aside and treat what
you are watching as a pure performance, you completely forget about the farce. The
level of showmanship at a WWE event is unrivaled in sports. There are more
lights, more fireworks, bigger moments, higher stakes (if only because they
design it that way, but still), and more intensity in every fight than you can
imagine. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> Even if you set
aside the wrestling, it is still an absolute blast to just see how the network
of storylines plays out. In what other area of athletics can you have a
champion lose their title in mere seconds? In the WWE, the <i>Money in the Bank</i> contracts make that possible. In what other area
of entertainment is such a large part of the fun bashing the leading men and
women in the industry, so much so that their cars are filled with cement and
their heads are shaved live in front of millions of viewers? In the WWE,
ripping on the McMahons is part of the culture.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> In short, give
wrestling a try. It is a hilarious, passionate, and hugely entertaining world. The
personalities are huge, the fans are some of the best in modern popular
culture, and those divas? Please.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> But wait—what happened
to CM Punk? Well, after the guy in the wheelchair had his goons throw the wrestler
through a table, the man declared the “best in the world” came back at the end
of the show, took a wooden rod from the announcer’s booth, and wailed on all
three of them, exacting his revenge in front of his home crowd. The opening
riff of that Living Colour song rang in your ears as you left.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> You cannot make
this stuff up, but hey, that is the norm in the WWE.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
Tyler "Dazz" Daswickhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03275267111192809648noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4469998399417341322.post-1346925842110901422013-08-30T17:07:00.000-07:002013-08-30T17:07:18.238-07:00Turning on Zombie Mode: 5 Changes That Would Make Fantasy Football Even Better<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgExuLoZYcktkqd9aoCMJOnvtEqVb7c2Wq7cdVtKPNM3UzYCjwleruXMWSgXB3ZAzlCNa28odSj3WJLzz6gM17zq3VEhiLvubwcCc9wYRxUunEKqvU8lwjOwGYpqT_TZ1rLQgKjWx20lDqi/s1600/693.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgExuLoZYcktkqd9aoCMJOnvtEqVb7c2Wq7cdVtKPNM3UzYCjwleruXMWSgXB3ZAzlCNa28odSj3WJLzz6gM17zq3VEhiLvubwcCc9wYRxUunEKqvU8lwjOwGYpqT_TZ1rLQgKjWx20lDqi/s320/693.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> I cannot wait,
friends—simply cannot wait. In just a few short days, football season will be
upon us. The opening kick will soar through the air, and all of the heartbreak,
triumph, and the I-can’t-believe-what-I-just-saw brand of craziness will be in
full force. Of course, if you fancy yourself a fantasy owner, your football
experience will always be two-fold—a touchdown that might damn your team into
the gloomy dregs of the division might also be the saving grace for your
digital team of all-stars. There are people who love it, people who hate it,
and there are always the people who just do not understand it. But you know
what? Who cares? You have a shot at a full year of bragging rights amongst your
peers, and that is totally worth alienating roughly fifty-percent of your
friends and family! Right? Right!<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> Fantasy football is
a heck of a lot of fun, but the thing is, it has the potential to be so much
more. The stakes can always be raised. The gambles can always be bigger. The
rewards, the sweet sweet rewards, can always be more bountiful. The Dazz staff
has come up with some tweaks in the system—tweaks that really put the <i>fantasy</i>, and the fun, into fantasy
football.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
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</span></span></b><!--[endif]--><b><span style="color: #002060; font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 18.0pt; line-height: 115%;">Lottery Mode<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> While most fantasy
leagues utilize the traditional “Snake-style” function (where you make your
picks in a randomized, pre-determined order), the truth is that auction-drafts
are infinitely better. In auction drafts, each owner is allotted $200, and over
the course of the draft they bid portions of this money on any player they
want. The better the player, the more you usually have to pay for him. Pretty
basic.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;">But
what if . . .</span></b><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> . . . there was a
way to spend a fraction of that cost, take a huge risk, and possibly <i> guarantee yourself a championship</i> if it
pays off? Introducing lottery mode! What if, at any point in an auction draft,
an owner could spend $5 out of their remaining funds to take a shot at “winning
the lottery.” There would be a one-percent chance of winning, but if luck
serves you well and you hit the jackpot, you have automatic rights to any three
players left on the board, totally free of charge.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> Consider that in
auction drafts, the first ten players or so are usually bought for an average
of $55-$60. With fifteen more players to buy to fill a standard roster, that is
pretty crippling to spend. But<i>, </i>if
you spend five bucks right off the bat and have a stroke of luck, you could
suddenly find yourself sitting on Adrian Peterson, Aaron Rodgers, <i>and</i> Marshawn Lynch for easy chump
change. You just saved yourself $175 and you have arguably the three best
fantasy players on your team! Sure, it is a long shot, but you would at least
consider rolling the dice once or twice, right? It adds a whole new layer of
strategy to the draft—everyone would try goading each other into potentially
wasting their money, and especially cruel leagues would see nine guys all
ganging up on one to try and have him blow $100 on lottery tickets.
Hilarious—but even more so if that poor slob ends up winning.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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</span></span></b><!--[endif]--><b><span style="color: #002060; font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 18.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> Buying Insurance<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> You know what
sucks? When your first-round pick in the fantasy draft blows out his knee in
the first game of the season and sinks your whole team (cut to everyone who
drafted Tom Brady in 2008 quietly weeping). That really sucks. A fantasy team
without that pick is horribly crippled, and almost a surefire lock to miss the
playoffs.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;">But
what if . . .</span></b><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> . . . you never had
to worry about that, because you bought insurance? Here is how it would work:
say you drafted Robert Griffin III this year, and you were worried his leg
would break in half again—for a little extra money in the auction drafts, or
for the sacrifice of a later pick in snake drafts, you could insure RGIII
against all injuries. So, if RGIII missed any playing time, you would not miss
the points.<br />
It could work like this: say you
drafted RGIII in a free snake-draft league. You could have the option to keep
him as-is, or, you could bundle him with an insurance policy at the price of
your 14<sup>th</sup>-round pick. If RGIII is hurt during the first eight games
of the season under your insurance, his point average from last season is
automatically plugged into your weekly scores (if you choose to start him). In
his case, you would have the security of 19 points a game—pretty good. If he is
hurt during the latter eight games of the season, you take his average from the
current season and add that into your total. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> You would be able
to insure as many players as you wanted, but it would always come at the cost
of late-round picks, bidding money, or minor add-ins to the pot in prize
leagues. Of course, these always come at the risk of a player not suffering an
injury, and then you would have wasted your money, pick, etc. Again, it adds
another layer to the high-risk/high-reward factor that fantasy is all about.
You could look brilliant when it is over, or you could look paranoid and, well,
stupid.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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</span></span></b><!--[endif]--><b><span style="color: #002060; font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 18.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> Money in the Bank<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> Right now, the
third-place game at the end of the fantasy season is pretty worthless. There
are no bragging rights that come with achieving third-place, and since it
already is the by-product of two first-round playoff losers, there is little to
feel good about to begin with.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;">But
what if . . .</span></b><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> . . . we went all
WWE up in our fantasy leagues?! For the uneducated, Money in the Bank is an
annual match put on by the world of wrestling. The match features a ton of WWE
stars, and the winner of the all-out brawl earns a silver briefcase with a
contract inside. This contract gives them the sole rights to challenge the
current reigning champion <i>anywhere and
anytime.</i> If they win, they take the belt. It is one of the best things the
WWE has produced in years—makes for great drama—and it is a perfect fit for
fantasy football.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> Take that
third-place game and turn it into a Money in the Bank showdown. Now, the winner
of this once-meaningless affair earns the rights to challenge a fantasy champion
<i>anywhere and anytime</i> during the
following season for the rights to the title.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> The most likely
scenario is, of course, using the contract right after someone wins the title
(you just could not do it in the same season you won Money in the Bank—that is
dumb, and defeats the purpose). Say you won Money in the Bank a year earlier,
but you ran into some bad luck this season and finished ninth out of ten teams.
Never fear, because you pull your contract after Week 17 and challenge the new
champ to a winner-take-all playoff! Both owners would draft three new players
(a QB, a back, and a wideout) set to play in the first round of the playoffs.
After the games, the fantasy points earned by those six players are tallied,
and the champ either keeps the crown or is forced to hand it off to you, Mr.
Started-from-the-bottom-now-we’re-here! Wow! This wrinkle would add a ton of
drama, and it would be a hell of a lot of fun to watch a feisty underdog claw
his way back to a title. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> There is a lot of
WTF-ey stuff in fantasy, and most of it comes from stuff like, “How the hell
can Julio Jones have two touchdowns one week, and then none the next with only
thirty effing yards?!” The unpredictable hills and valleys suck, and they give
owners absolute fits. If a player is hot, how come they can never stay hot?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;">But
what if . . .<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> . . . they could? Remember
the good old days of video arcades, when a young Suns fan could rain jumpers
with Charles Barkley, watch him catch on fire, and then just throw him the
alley-oop with Jason Kidd every time you came down the court? I sure do. Man,
the days of playing NBA Jam were insanely fun, and adopting some of its ways
could give fantasy a huge boost of entertainment.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> Obviously, you
would start with having a player “catch on fire.” In the arcade version of NBA
jam, if one player made three shots in a row, they would literally burst into
flame and become faster, more accurate, and completely dominant. Let’s light
some football players on fire too! Now, having three insane weeks of football
in a row is really tough, so what if we made it a little easier by establishing
three-week benchmarks for each position? Quarterbacks would have to earn a
total of 70 fantasy points, running backs would have to earn 35 points, receivers
need 35 as well, etc. Once a player catches fire, their point total for the
ensuing week sees a 50% boost, no matter what. Players would be able to stay on
fire if they keep doing well (using single-game benchmarks—say, 20 points for
QBs, 14 for RBs, and 11 for WRs), and the point bonus would carry over.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> Oh, and in case you
were wondering, if Adrian Peterson had used NBA Jam Rules last season, he would
have been on fire for <i>four straight
weeks, </i>from weeks 8 to 12 (11 was his bye). Wow.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
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</span></span></b><!--[endif]--><b><span style="color: #002060; font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 18.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> Zombie Mode<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> More often than not
in fantasy, things just do not pan out. It has happened to all of us: sleepers
never wake up, early picks have down years, stars suffer season-ending
injuries—it comes with being an owner. When you have a bad year in fantasy
football, it might not always be because you had poor draft strategy or you did
not prepare well enough. It might just be pure dumb luck kicking you in the
butt again.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;">But
what if . . .</span></b><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> . . . you could
make your own luck? Zombie Mode is here, friends. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> Here is how it would
work: after any of their draft picks, an owner could immediately choose to
zombify one, <i>and just one</i>, of their
players. When a player is zombified, they literally become the player they were
at any earlier point in their careers—which point is up to the owner.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> An example will
explain this best: say you draft Tom Brady in the third round this year. His
receivers are gone, he is growing older, and you are worried he might not be
the same quarterback he was in the past, so you decide to zombify him. Being a
savvy NFL historian, you know that Tom Brady had one of the best statistical
seasons <i>ever</i> in 2007, when he threw
for over 4,800 yards and 50 touchdowns. You decide to create Zombie-2007-Brady.
All of his stats carry over week to week, so when you start Zombie-2007-Brady
on Week 1 for this year’s league, he would earn your team 23 points, because in
Week 1 of the 2007 season, Brady threw for 297 yards and three scores against
the Jets. Pretty sweet deal, right?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> It comes with some
strings attached, naturally. First off, you can only zombify one player each
year—more and it is just a little too ridiculous. Second of all, when you
zombify a player in a draft, you forfeit your pick for the next round (maybe
you can just take a kicker, or in auction leagues you forfeit $10 or
something). You also must start the zombie every single week, <i>even on their bye week.</i> It is harsh, but
it is only fair when you have an all-time great on your roster. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> Another wrinkle: if
your opponent for the week has a player in the same position who ends up
earning a higher total than the zombie, the zombie is unplayable for one week
following (debated calling this being “shot in the head”). Suddenly,
Zombie-2007-Brady has a problem. Smart owners would see that in Week 15 of his
2007 season, Tom Brady threw for only 140 yards, no touchdowns, and even had an
interception. That is only three little points—incredibly easy to beat.
Suddenly, Zombie-2007-Brady is inactive for Week 16’s game. He stays a starter,
but his points are negated, so the roster spot is wasted on his team. Being the
first week of the championship game, it might not be worth it to zombify Brady
after all.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> A few things I
personally love about this rule: it rewards research and preparation, and
emphasizes strong finishes over strong starts—crucial in fantasy. It also has
fantastic high-risk/high-reward flexibility. Do you play it safe and zombify
Adrian Peterson this year, and ensure that he repeats last year’s heroics? You
could, but if he is somehow even better this season, you wasted your zombify
ability <i>and </i>that second-round pick
you forfeited. On the other hand, if a player is hurt, it becomes irrelevant if
they are a zombie. If you zombify them to a season when they played all 16
games, then they are guaranteed to play all 16 of those games for you. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> Finally, the
sneak-factor of Zombie Mode is off the charts. Consider that LaDainian
Tomlinson is in this year’s draft. Of course, he is all but irrelevant right
now, but if you nab with your last pick and zombify him to
Zombie-2006-Tomlinson, you do not have to relinquish any draft picks, and you
just stole a player who is going to score 31 touchdowns and gain 2,300 yards
from scrimmage for the season—in your third running back spot to boot, which
would make the chances of him being shot in the head and unplayable for a week
rather slim. Careful researchers would be able to find these players every
year, and it totally redefines how you think of sleepers. Zombie Mode adds a
whole other layer to fantasy football—it keeps the draft interesting in the
later rounds, it produces some insane matchup potential (imagine
Zombie-2007-Brady and Zombie-2004-Peyton Manning going ape on each other to try
and survive the next week!), and it adds brand new depth to the degrees of
strategy involved. It relies less on luck and more on perception. It brings
fantasy back to its roots, and more importantly, it makes things way more
interesting, way more entertaining, and most of all, way more fun.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> Good luck everyone.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"><br /></span></div>
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Tyler "Dazz" Daswickhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03275267111192809648noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4469998399417341322.post-55771847407743837152013-08-25T10:51:00.001-07:002013-08-25T10:51:55.351-07:00Blood and Ice Cream and Fine Comedy: The World's End Review<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> In a summer laced
with unnecessary nudity, cheap shock-humor, and mega-flop blockbusters, <i>The World’s End </i>stands alone. It
delivers a tight, thrilling, and absolutely hilarious movie-going experience. It
is a knock-out ending to the terrific Three Flavours Cornetto Trilogy, and it
is absolutely the best movie of the summer.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> Like <i>Shaun of the Dead</i> and <i>Hot Fuzz</i> before it, <i>The World’s End</i> combines rough action with brilliant comedy—this time,
telling the story of a group of buddies who attempt to finish a legendary pub
crawl in the midst of an alien invasion. Simon Pegg plays the inflated and
conceited Gary King, the self-proclaimed leader of the gang, while Three
Flavours-compatriot Nick Frost plays his (initially) straight-laced childhood
friend. Martin Freeman, Pierce Brosnan, and the ever-present Bill Nighy round
out a terrific cast, and while it would seem that <i>The World’s End </i>is primed to fall for the usual film clichés that
we see in the old-guys-relive-the-glory-days stories, it does anything but that.
Too old for this sh**? Not here. The movie does not even take a sniff in that
direction—incredibly refreshing.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> This is perhaps
most indicative in the fact that <i>The
World’s End</i> approaches its action irreverently and intelligently—these sequences
are truly fun to watch, and some of the finishing moves that the gang pulls on
their adversaries are badass, insane, and just damn cool. Ever see an alien
split in half over a urinal or become the victim of a Nick Frost pile-driver? I
sure have, and I loved every freaking second of it.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> Of course, the
reason any of us will venture out to see this flick is for the laughs, and wow,
does the film deliver. Instead of relying on trite sight-gags or forgettable
crass humor, the writing here takes a smart, genuine approach. The comedy here
is pure, consistent, and versatile; a laugh can come from dialogue just as
easily as it can come from the goofy mannerisms and actions of the characters
(and never fear, trilogy fans, the old fence gag is back!). Snappy lines and witty
exchanges run aplenty, and in a year full of less-than-stellar efforts, it is
brilliant to see such excellent writing coming from people who are just so
intrinsically funny. Forget funniest comedy of the summer—it might be the
funniest movie of the year.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> The plethora of
laughs is primarily supplied by our two leads, and Simon Pegg and Nick Frost
assert themselves in this flick as one of the best comedy duos of our time.
Their chemistry is terrific—a result of them being real-life friends—and when
the movie takes its emotional turns, they play the buddy-buddy scenes so well
that it is perfectly impossible not to cheer for them. They are the absolute
stars of their own show, and director Wright more than gives them their due.
These guys have given us three terrific movies (and <i>Paul</i>, but come on, for the sake of the moment, I think we can all
just brush that one aside), and seeing them go out on such a high note is going
to really satisfy fans.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> If there is
anything negative to say about this flick, it is that the final act might be a
tad up-and-down in balancing its emotion and comedy, but not to worry, because
the “low points” only feel as such because the highs are just so darn good.
Indeed, the climax of <i>The World’s End</i>
might deliver the single best comedy scene since the infamous tuna exchange
from <i>The Other Guys.</i> I still laugh
when I think about this one—inspired comedy at its finest.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> <i>The World’s End</i> simply does not mess
around. It is here to bring fun action and big laughs, and it delivers both in
droves. The emotional scenes are tight and to-the-point, without a bunch of
oversaturated dialogue or cornball direction. More than anything, though, this
film is a triumph for Simon Pegg and Nick Frost, who not only give the audience
another satisfying and grounded buddy-flick, but cement themselves as one of
the greatest comedy duos of the modern age.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> It is useless
arguing—<i>The World’s End </i>kicks a lot
of ass, takes a lot of names, and is terrifically charming and funny. The
conclusion of the Three Flavours Cornetto Trilogy might just be the best of the
three. It earns a 9 out of 10, and stands as the greatest movie of the summer.
Go and see it—it deserves your attention. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
Tyler "Dazz" Daswickhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03275267111192809648noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4469998399417341322.post-9250936631223518682013-08-20T19:08:00.001-07:002013-08-20T19:08:39.296-07:00Modern Classics: The Beats That Never Die<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> Perhaps Dre said it
best when he blamed it on Ice Cube: “Because he says it gets funky/When you got
a subject and a predicate./Add it on a dope beat/and that’ll make you think.”<br />
As any self-respecting DJ will tell
you, Dre knows that the key to any great hip-hop or rap song is that killer
groove behind the rhymes—you know, the steady line that makes you put your
hands up or bob your head or just downright get funky with it. My father (who,
by the way, <i>loathes </i>this kind of
music, and therefore knows nothing about this article) lovingly calls this
phenomenon “the kathunka kathunka.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> Over the years,
hip-hop and rap has solidified itself as a music mainstay, and many modern
artists, such as Eminem, Nas, and Tupac Shakur, have already earned their way
into several “Greatest Artists of All Time” lists, largely for their lyrical
prowess. But today, we want to show some respect for guys like Dre, and we want
to highlight some beats that just refuse to grow old. These are the beats that
survive on their own, without the words. These are the beats that demand to be
mixed and mashed and emulated and honored. These are the beats that made people
stars. These are the Beats That Never Die.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Impact","sans-serif"; font-size: 18.0pt; line-height: 115%;">It Was a Good Day, Ice Cube</span></div>
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</span><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> You hear that? That is music, friends!
Something really terrific about old-school rap is the pure emphasis on laying
the spoken word over actual music, and not just a pulsing bass line. A great
example is “Good Day”<i>.</i> So relaxed, so
mellow, and completely worthy of a windows-down drive through areas of town
where you will not be shot. The feel is almost jazzy, and if you play an
instrument, you might just hear some improvisation opportunities sprinkled
throughout this one. This one is beyond just a solid beat, it functions as a
totally liable song, sans-Cube. And the best part? He still does not have to
use his AK.</span><span style="line-height: 115%; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Impact","sans-serif"; font-size: 18.0pt; line-height: 115%;">Dirt Off Your Shoulder, Jay-Z<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> I know we just
lauded the use of “real” instruments, but electronic beats certainly have their
place too, not the least of which is evidenced by Timbaland’s <i>absolutely dirty</i> throw-down with Shawn
Carter here. Remember when we talked about beats that just make you move?
Coming right up. Put on some headphones and crank this one—to say that
Timbaland brings the bass is absolute sacrilege. He <i>crushes</i> that bass line. It charges your ears in one of the nastiest
aural assaults of modern rap. It just plain kills.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> Let’s keep it
current for a second. More and more nowadays, songs are relying on simple
series of notes to create something catchy—think along the lines of Tyga’s
three-tone “Rack City” or MGMT’s nine-note keyboard line on “Kids”—people
remember simple stuff; easy to hum, easy to whistle—this stuff is why things
are stuck in your head. 50’s “In da Club” totally nails this phenomenon. With
three little <i>bum-Bum</i> accents, we have
one of the most versatile party beats of the last decade. It does not matter if
you have never been up in da club, rolling 20 deep, or mistaken for a player or
pimp, when this song comes on, it stays on. And when people like P. Diddy, Lil
Wayne, and (wait for it!) <i><a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hJEm9WpgTwA" target="_blank">freaking Beyonce</a></i> are borrowing the tune to lay over their own lyrics, you know you
have a good thing here.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> Did anyone combine
rock and rap more effectively than these guys? The debate is there, and this
song’s timeless riff embodies the duality of the entire group. <i>A rap song with a guitar solo?</i>
Madness—but it is mad genius too. What makes this instrumental absolutely
legendary is its universal appeal: rock fans can do guitar covers, drum covers,
etc., and rap fans can lay down their own rhymes. The modern fan might point to
Eminem’s “Lose Yourself” as a terrific use of electric guitar within a rap
song, but this song did it more than fifteen year earlier, and the style is so
much more in-your-face, outrageous, and badass that this simply demands the
nod. When you hear this riff, you know it is Beastie Boys, and you know it is
good.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> Is a defense even
necessary? This is still a dance floor staple, it features a perfect blend of
live instruments with electronic sounds, you recognize it as soon as you hear
it, and it is the pure epitome of a head-bobbing, hands-up jam. Oh, and the
video was shot in the Thunderdome from <i>Mad
Max. </i>California does <i>indeed</i> know
how to party. Thank you and please drive through.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> Sorry, what was
that? I had some trouble hearing you over the combined sound of this absolutely
nasty beat and the <i>freaking President of
the United States saying<a href="http://www.mtv.com/news/articles/1648925/president-obama-has-jay-z-little-lil-wayne-on-his-ipod.jhtml" target="_blank"> he has some of this </a>on his iPod. </i>With an intro
this monstrously epic, you know the Commander in Chief is queuing up some
“Fireman” when he rolls into the Situation Room. You know what? This beat kicks
so much ass, it demands a certain partnership. You are thinking it. I am
thinking it. <a href="http://i.imgur.com/HR8bS.gif" target="_blank">Let’s just watch some guys do a slow-motion walk away from an explosionwhile we play this tune.</a><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> This tune featured
a lot of big names, from the Doctor himself to Snoop Doggy Dogg (as he was then
called—and don’t even tell me you hate Snoop Lion! It’s still Snoop, he’s
always going to be the D. O. Double-G, so quit your moaning—you’d still totally
chill with him—let the dude evolve!) to Nate Dogg to some guy named Kurupt
(who, after a quick Google search, I found has been nominated for a Grammy, in
1996, for a song he did with someone named Daz—whaddup). What makes this beat
really classic is, aside from its catchy simplicity and dance-ability, it
somehow manages to fit the style of all of the artists involved with the song.
It sounds like a Dre beat, it sounds like something either Dogg would jam with,
and I am sure that all 19 of the die-hard Kurupt fans out there would agree
that it works for him too. We have thrown around the word “versatility” a lot
in this piece, but this beat is just another example. Dre—whataguy.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Impact","sans-serif"; font-size: 18.0pt; line-height: 115%;">Ni**as in Paris, Jay-Z and Kanye West<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> Oh, shut up. Even
the most modern of rap music can churn out killer beats like this, and do not
tell me that you never busted one out on the dance floor trying to ball so hard
and all that other fun I-have-trouble-relating-to-this-song-in-real-life-because-really-why-is-Kanye-talking-about-fish-filets
stuff. This beat is dope, and it is the reason that we have been the audience
to about fifty-million remixes and mash-ups in the past year and a half. You
know the song as soon as you hear those first two notes, and even when Kanye
reminds us yet again that, seriously guys, we better not let him into his zone,
the bass is cranked and you still think it is damn cool. This was <i>the beat</i> of 2011, and we are going to
keep hearing it for a long time to come. Instant classic.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Impact","sans-serif"; font-size: 18.0pt; line-height: 115%;">C.R.E.A.M., Wu Tang Clan<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> A moment of
humbling honesty here: this song was a last-minute addition—it overtook Lloyd
Banks’ “Beamer, Benz, or Bentley” (I know, I know) and Lil Wayne’s “Six Foot
Seven Foot”—and I will tell you why. Both of those songs have great beats, but
they are straight-up repetitive. “Ni**as in Paris” up there is successful
largely because of its continued breakdowns and switch-ups—it is easy to listen
all the way through without stopping. Not so with Banks or Wayne’s tunes. It is
the same line over and over, and while “C.R.E.A.M.” has moments of repetition,
the groove itself brings enough components to keep things fresh, <i>even while the notes stay the same.</i> They
add vocals, accents, oohs and ahhs. It creates a massively-effective song that
can be a mellow, sit-back-and-bob-your-head tune for one listen, and then a
dance tune for another listen. Wu Tang Clan brought us something completely
original and inventive—a timeless tune, that works at any time.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Impact","sans-serif"; font-size: 18.0pt; line-height: 115%;">Paper Planes, M.I.A.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Impact","sans-serif"; font-size: 18.0pt; line-height: 115%;"><br /></span></div>
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<iframe allowfullscreen='allowfullscreen' webkitallowfullscreen='webkitallowfullscreen' mozallowfullscreen='mozallowfullscreen' width='320' height='266' src='https://www.youtube.com/embed/-iKtiveApUo?feature=player_embedded' frameborder='0'></iframe></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Impact","sans-serif"; font-size: 18.0pt; line-height: 115%;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> You have to end
with a crowd-pleaser. Done over and over again, “Paper Planes” is one of those
songs that somehow everyone just seems to know. It runs amuck through popular
culture even today, and you see it everywhere from movies to parties to radio
to ice cream shop background-music. It simply has not gone away, and thanks to
some of the best use of sound effects in rap history (those gun-shots with the
cash register—genius—to make them such an integral part of the song was bold as
hell, and now you have one of the most recognizable sequences in the last
decade of music), it just might stick around a while longer. Sure, the main
riff might have borrowed from The Clash, but is that really a bad thing? The
spin it received was great enough in its own right. We will remember this tune
as a staple in the world of hip-hop and rap.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<i><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;">Honorable
Mentions: “6 Foot 7 Foot”—Lil Wayne, “Beamer, Benz, or Bentley”—Lloyd Banks,
“Around the World”—Daft Punk, “The Message”—Grandmaster Flash, “Who Shot
Ya”—Notorious B.I.G., “Nuthin But a G Thang”—Dr. Dre and Snoop Dogg</span></i><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"><br />
<br />
<i>Have a song you feel should have been on
the list? We want to hear about it—let us know via Twitter or Facebook! Special
thanks goes out to reader and friend Jordan Costello for his much-needed
insight and opinion into the world of hip-hop and rap; you were a great help,
friend!</i><o:p></o:p></span></div>
Tyler "Dazz" Daswickhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03275267111192809648noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4469998399417341322.post-6706183960641143082013-08-10T18:14:00.002-07:002013-08-10T20:19:33.872-07:00Time to Cook: Getting Pumped for the End of Breaking Bad<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhVelESX3sdHIuzeHJWYmV-9g87UmRbkXDAnUxsZcuBk1Rw6ETCiU6cvbOPlxZcl9dII_jpPcyWdgY1BlwqzAgE1o96JV0NnOcMTjHH6Tx34XVNSew3tLTOrFEM4bIPe5vBXReytP3kjUIN/s1600/BB-tease-21.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="225" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhVelESX3sdHIuzeHJWYmV-9g87UmRbkXDAnUxsZcuBk1Rw6ETCiU6cvbOPlxZcl9dII_jpPcyWdgY1BlwqzAgE1o96JV0NnOcMTjHH6Tx34XVNSew3tLTOrFEM4bIPe5vBXReytP3kjUIN/s400/BB-tease-21.jpg" width="400" /></a></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"><br /> Ladies and
gentlemen, we have arrived at our destination.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> For the past five
years, Vince Gilligan and Co. have blessed us with what is undoubtedly the
greatest running program on television, and in just eight weeks—eight short,
fleeting, hell-ridden weeks—the final fade-out will conclude the epic descent
of Walter White. There are a thousand questions surrounding the details of what
is to come, but the one question for you, right now, is this:<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> Are you <i>effing</i> ready for this?!<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> You better be
(bitch!).<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> Few shows are about
The End. More often than not, a television series will hit the prime of its
writing somewhere around the third season. This is when <i>Mad Men </i>hit another level, when <i>The
Office</i> churned out the most laughs, when <i>Lost </i>became more WTF-ey than it ever was, and<i> </i>when <i>The Wire</i> went from
just something different to the biggest trend-bucker of modern media. After the
peak though, comes an almost inevitable decline. <i>The Office</i>, and most other sitcoms, grew considerably less funny. <i>Lost</i> hiccupped and became oversaturated
with questions. Even <i>The Wire</i> is
considered to miss a step in its final season. When this happens, The End is
almost never as satisfying as fans want it to be. <i>Lost</i> and <i>The Sopranos</i> in
particular are notorious for their less-than-stellar endings (although, I have
to defend <i>Lost</i> for a second here and
just ask any fan this, “If you hated the ending, then how would <i>you</i> have ended it?” Seriously, there was
no other way. I loved the ending. Screw you. God.), and it turned a lot of “great
show” talks into “yeah, but” talks.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> <i>Breaking Bad</i>, however, is in a brilliant
position, because this show has always been about the ending. We knew that we
were going out with Walter from day one, and wow has it been an insane ride to
the finish (almost like a . . . <i>dead freight!</i> Hey-oh! Sorry. I
challenged myself to see how many little references I could plug in here).
Whether you were with Heisenberg from the beginning on AMC, or caught up on
Netflix, it does not matter, because everything in <i>Breaking Bad</i> has been guiding us to this glorious conclusion. <i>We watched this entire series just for this.</i>
There has never been anything like it.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> This show is
unique, too, in that the atmosphere surrounding these final eight hours is not
only full of hype, but it is seriously <i>confident.</i>
No one expects them to flop, and this another by-product of the writer’s entire
countdown to Walter’s death. If this has been what they have been working
toward all along, and all the filler stuff in the middle was of such amazing
quality, can you imagine how freaking awesome the home-stretch is going to be?!
It is unheard of! <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> Sure, stuff has
changed along the way (fun fact: Jesse was supposed to die in the first season,
but after he emerged as a fan-favorite, the writers kept him in), but adapting
the end goal is considerably better than drumming it up from scratch. This is
why fans of <i>Lost </i>were sweating and fans
of <i>The Office </i>had their fingers
crossed and their eyes shut tight. Only here, in the world of us meth-heads (AMC
calls us “Breaking Baddicts”, but that is a horribly lame pun and much too
long, so suck it AMC, we are meth-heads, like we were supposed to be all
along), is everyone just flat-out pumped. <i>We</i>
<i>cannot wait. </i>We are fully prepared
for The End of this show to blow us away.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> No matter what
happens, you can guarantee that not everyone is going to see it coming. The further
beauty of this set-up is emphasized by the insane number of theories being
tossed around by fans. Will Walt just die of cancer, in a hospital with his
family around him? Will he be shot and killed by Jesse? By Hank? Hell, even
suicide is not totally out of the question—he tried that in the first goddamn
episode! Literally anything can happen, because if this series has taught us
anything, it is that these writers will shy from nothing, and that these
characters are capable of some dark, dark things (I have to throw out my
opinion here and present my theory—Walt, whether by accident or on purpose,
will contribute to the death of Jesse, and this will be his final what-have-I-done
moment. As he atones for everything, the cancer takes him . . . yeesh, I have
chills, can we just go to Sunday now?).<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> We left Walter
White while he was simultaneously at his most sinister and his most vulnerable.
The showdown we have expected all along is here. The revelations, long hidden,
are going to come out and rear their ugly, twisted heads. Friends will become
enemies. Empires will fall. People will die.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> Soak it all in.
This is it. <i>Breaking Bad</i> is coming
down to its glorious, disturbing, I-can’t-believe-what-I-just-saw ending, and
you can bet that the rest of the meth-heads and I are going to be right there
with our heroes, antiheroes, and hated psycho-wives until the very last second.
Buckle the hell up, everyone, because the one who knocks is banging on the
door.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> His message is
clear, friends: <i>it’s time to cook.</i><o:p></o:p></span></div>
Tyler "Dazz" Daswickhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03275267111192809648noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4469998399417341322.post-83736492993975908832013-08-10T09:24:00.002-07:002013-08-10T09:24:42.890-07:00Mech Suits, Space Stations, and Screwing Over Jodie Foster: Elysium Review<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgFr6nLlSmL9dPo7yWBmXvapg0whIv-5uXTjlocQoFIX_NXOrWX-bkpx9YqU3uGJadtKyovmk5Tg4N5dvfwKdtXP9kETWEBZSqYrK5OETjtsOByzXnSZlsj2oywFLutnMceko8dVDfd7cyk/s1600/elysium.cb2.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="174" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgFr6nLlSmL9dPo7yWBmXvapg0whIv-5uXTjlocQoFIX_NXOrWX-bkpx9YqU3uGJadtKyovmk5Tg4N5dvfwKdtXP9kETWEBZSqYrK5OETjtsOByzXnSZlsj2oywFLutnMceko8dVDfd7cyk/s320/elysium.cb2.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"><br /></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> </span></b><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;">This summer, we have yet to see
<i>the movie.</i> That is, the killer app that
alluringly drags us to theaters, slams us into chairs, and blows us away whether
we were ready for it or not. <i>Elysium </i>was
poised to be that flick—the director and writer of the best sci-fi movie of the
past five years brought aboard our main man Matt Damon for another original
on-screen story. Sign me the hell up for that.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> Did it pan out,
though? Not quite—you have a solid sci-fi here, but not something that captures
the same magic that <i>District 9</i> did in
2009.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> The premise here
certainly brings the intrigue, even if it paints on some similar class-warfare
tones that <i>D9 </i>presented. Matt Damon
plays Max, a convicted felon out on parole in a dense, over-populated Los
Angeles in the 2100s. Above the planet-wide slum that is this new Earth hovers
the alluring Elysium, a massive space station where the planet’s elite have
taken refuge from the squalor. Elysium has a cure for cancer, lush greenery,
and many a garden party. Naturally, people on Earth regularly try to break onto
the utopian station—too bad they are all shot on arrival. Yeah, things kind of
suck in Matt Damon’s neighborhood, but after a deadly dose of radiation and the
addition of a sweet-ass exo-suit, he looks to make his way up the orbiting
paradise, and (surprise surprise!) maybe save Earth in the process.<br />
Easily the standout of <i>Elysium</i> is the action. Director Neil
Blomkamp’s track record of sweet weapons and videogame-esque set pieces is only
extended here, and some of the best scenes revolve around the featured
exo-suits for both Matt Damon and one of his future nemeses (no spoilers here,
sucka). All the futuristic tech is flat-out sick to see in action, whether it’s
the tracer rounds that attract mobile explosives, bullets that explode within a
five-meter radius of the target, or the criminally-underused ChemRail. It is
enough to make you wish <i>Elysium</i> was a
videogame, which may or may not be a good thing.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> See, the movie’s
biggest issue is that, while it sets the stage for the examination of some
pretty mature themes, it never quite achieves the depth that we know Blomkamp
can achieve. Characters feel under-written, the relationship-developments are a
tad cliché, and while Jodie Foster initially presents an intriguing villain as
the ruthless, cutthroat Secretary of Defense on Elysium, but (trying hard not
to spoil anything here) the script eventually throws her the finger in favor of
more traditional science-fiction fare. It was a jarring, disappointing turn for
a flick that, despite some holes here and there, at least had the integrity of
trying something original. It makes even less sense in retrospect than it did
while we were watching.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> The cast in itself
does a decent job with what they are given, but the truth is they just are not
given much to work with. I would hesitate to call it a waste of talent (harsh
much?), but with Damon, Foster, and the surprisingly-versatile Sharlto Copley
(he was the lead in <i>D9</i>), it is hard
not to wonder why this movie was not able to attain more emotional depth.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> That, ultimately,
is <i>Elysium’s</i> undoing—while everything
on the surface looks great, from the terrific cast to the spectacular sci-fi
imagery to the acutely-detailed world, beyond the surface there just is not
much. Even the parable-like themes are not explored as much as they should be,
and are indeed lost in the shuffle along the way. Many times we come <i>this close</i> to having a great scene or a
great moment, but the movie never quite seals the envelope. We never have <i>the moment.</i> It is too bad.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> Comparisons to <i>District 9</i> might seem unfair at first,
but when the writer, director, actor, <i>and
</i>underlying theme are all the same, it invites the question why <i>Elysium</i> cannot quite do what its
predecessor positively triumphed at—bringing the emotion. The segregated world
of Elysium is well-realized and really interesting, but thanks to some
hard-to-ignore plot holes, a lack of emotional punch, and the underwritten
characters, the movie never truly satisfies. The seamless visuals and balls-out
action will make you glad you saw it, but once you leave the theater there just
is not much to remember. There is more to talk about what could have or should
have been here than what actually is. It is an acceptable sci-fi, but it is not
<i>the movie</i> this summer. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> 6.5/10.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
Tyler "Dazz" Daswickhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03275267111192809648noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4469998399417341322.post-60817874478032746172013-07-17T18:33:00.005-07:002013-07-17T22:09:56.791-07:00Total Injustice: How the Zimmerman Trial Showed the Ugly Side of America<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjUAyZNBTkYxxiNrYBw0s7iaW0lehae1E3HXqhrrSXBJIVHECWvjueiyfQ2kO4aItWf9FoEWnAqKX2vMElBuPaFOA2aoou3R-6S9oVzf4Wxxz49oM8Rbbi5N54WrjEYzEztI8ovwoTgHPIl/s1600/trayvon-martin.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="302" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjUAyZNBTkYxxiNrYBw0s7iaW0lehae1E3HXqhrrSXBJIVHECWvjueiyfQ2kO4aItWf9FoEWnAqKX2vMElBuPaFOA2aoou3R-6S9oVzf4Wxxz49oM8Rbbi5N54WrjEYzEztI8ovwoTgHPIl/s320/trayvon-martin.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> A few days ago, I
received the worst “what if” I have ever heard. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> Playing around with
what-ifs is something that you see a lot in journalism. The speculations are
usually casual, thought-provoking, but always in good fun. This one was
decidedly different.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> I was chatting with
a professor about the verdict on the Zimmerman trial, and our email exchange
revolved around a single question I had for him: was the decision a result of
the prosecution’s ineptitude to present proof, or was the jury racially
motivated? After some brief thoughts, he closed his response with the
following:<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> <i>Ask yourself this, Tyler: Do you think
Zimmerman would have reacted the same way if he’d seen you walking through his
neighborhood?<o:p></o:p></i></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> ‘Food for thought’
is a little bit of an understatement, no? Keep this in mind while we backtrack
a little bit here.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> What we had here
with this trial was the apparent murder of a young black man by a half-white,
half-Hispanic neighborhood watch volunteer. Trayvon Martin was unarmed, and
George Zimmerman carried an automatic weapon. The prosecution needed to show
that Zimmerman had malicious intent in confronting Martin, and the defense
needed to show that Martin had only been killed in self-defense—that the young man
had instigated the violence himself. At its roots though, this was a murder
case.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> Sounds strange,
does it not? After all, what were the predominant themes in the media during
this whole trial? The jury is all female. There are no black people on the
jury. Zimmerman was half-white and Martin was African-American. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> The questions were
worse. Was Zimmerman a racist? Was Trayvon asking for it? Should these
neighborhood watch volunteers have guns in the first place?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> The real question
should be this: Are we not missing something? A young man is dead! The person
of Trayvon Martin, amidst all of the race questions and observations, was
totally lost, and it was not the first time we saw something like this.
Remember the O.J. Simpson trial? Instead of the focus being on the horrible
passing of two people, all you heard about were the white folks crying for an
outrage and the black folks cheering on “their man” as he attempts to outrace
the police. A time of mourning became a time for this inflated racial competition
of sorts. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> Is this not what we
saw again here with Zimmerman? If the man was convicted, it was a victory for
blacks, a chance for some sweet justice after so many lifetimes and generations
of Rodney Kings and Emmett Tills. This may be largely justified historically,
but as we saw in the Simpson trial, there have been times where it was more
about beating the white folks and less about seeing justice for the deceased.
Of course, in the incidences like the Rodney King beating, the opposite was true
for whites—no justice, just an opportunity to show people who was in charge. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> Back to the
what-if. If George Zimmerman saw me
instead of Trayvon Martin, the answer—undoubtedly and assuredly—is that he does
not give me a second thought. Instead of rousing suspicion, I am allowed to go
home and eat my Skittles and drink my iced tea and live out the rest of my
young adult life unconscious of my inadvertent advantages. There is no death,
no trial, no rousing national debate. Instead, fate was wicked enough to drop
Trayvon Martin at the wrong place at the wrong time, and now we face the
consequences of one man’s assumptions—whether he was aware of them or not.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> What exactly these
consequences entail joins the list of ugly questions that America faces in the
wake of this ordeal. It is easy to point at history and say empty things along
the lines of, “But look how far we’ve come. But look where we were. But it was
so much worse.” But—but—but nothing. We live in a time where homosexuals can
marry freely, women regularly head major corporations, and a non-white
individual sits in the most powerful position on the planet. A black teenager
should be able to walk home and eat his candy in peace. We should be able to
observe critical trials without making racial alliances. We should be able to
mourn the lives that were lost without any mind toward skin color. In this
country, our desire to beat out “the other guys” in the justice system
overshadowed the tragic death of a teenager. Sure does not sound progressive to
me.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> For weeks and weeks
now, we heard that we needed justice for Trayvon Martin. Whether you believe
the courts gave it to him or not does not matter now. What does matter is that
America never gave him justice. Instead, we were blinded by color, and we
failed to honor a bright young life or mourn the loss of a hopeful future. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> There was never
justice for Trayvon Martin, not from us, not from the courts, not from anyone.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> We have the
capacity to be better than this, but in these racially-sensitive situations, we
have not shown it. What happens next is up to us—there is no formula, no
instruction manual, no guidelines. It comes down to us being decent people, and
remembering the decent people behind all of these tragic stories. We have to
remember that this is not about race—it is about people.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> Only then can
justice truly be served.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
Tyler "Dazz" Daswickhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03275267111192809648noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4469998399417341322.post-6308011205887008772013-07-13T20:17:00.001-07:002014-01-02T15:16:47.786-07:00Sleeper Hits: Hidden-Gem Movies You Need to Watch this Summer<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgn3UItaxOcmG1GxoGu3VbkIWYLs557x2_ZN7ESjTw956OMF46xC_GPbDraZ_21995cxmB6j7jTPuxSw-Sop3y3b9CEYPBKvNAuZD29jeUhrlekvNNqfjQkw4_4MiRIxvbiqk1vJq9YiBHw/s1600/Ryan-Reynolds-buried1.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="175" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgn3UItaxOcmG1GxoGu3VbkIWYLs557x2_ZN7ESjTw956OMF46xC_GPbDraZ_21995cxmB6j7jTPuxSw-Sop3y3b9CEYPBKvNAuZD29jeUhrlekvNNqfjQkw4_4MiRIxvbiqk1vJq9YiBHw/s320/Ryan-Reynolds-buried1.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> It is summer, and
you are slacking. Maybe you peel yourself off the couch or away from the fridge
long enough to see a popcorn-blockbuster or skim <i>Game of Thrones’</i> Wikipedia page to catch up on what happened, but a
slacker you are, and a slacker I am too.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> No longer. Seeing
as ‘tis the season to be a little butt-sore on your couch all day, I will not
stop you, because dammitall if you are not going to exercise your god-given
right to watch terrible Adam Sandler movies on FX or old re-runs of <i>Chopped. </i>What I want you to do though,
what I am <i>imploring</i> you to do, is to
use this couch time wisely. How? Easy—take some chances on the hidden gems of
Hollywood.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> A lot of flicks are
lost in the never-ending cinematic shuffle these days. Whether they had the
misfortune of debuting alongside budget-bloated cash-ins or were just victims
of limited releases, there are some truly great movies out there that are
criminally under-viewed. So <s>start pirating</s> head on down to your local
video store (after, of course, you go back in time to when those things were
relevant) and pick up these flicks—whatever genre you prefer, you might just
find a new favorite.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<b><span style="color: red; font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 18.0pt; line-height: 115%;">Action<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;">Shoot
‘Em Up</span></b><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> No, that is not two
genres mistakenly tacked on top of each other. <i>Shoot ‘Em Up</i> is the name of the flick, and it is a hell of a flick
to boot. Terrifically self-aware, surprisingly clever, and glossed over with a
jam-tastic soundtrack and scores of so-over-the-top-it’s-awesome action
scenes—this is one where you sit back, chomp on the munchies, and enjoy the
ride. <i>Shoot ‘Em Up</i> is there to point
out the ridiculousness of other shoot ‘em ups, and it does that by being as
absurd as possible. It knows exactly what it is, and it does it really darn
well.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> Oh, and did I
mention that it features none other than Clive Owen spouting some of the
greatest one-liners you will <i>ever</i>
hear? Believe it. Turn your brain off and watch <i>Shoot ‘Em Up.<o:p></o:p></i></span></div>
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<i><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;">Honorable
Mentions: Hot Fuzz<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
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<b><span style="color: red; font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 18.0pt; line-height: 115%;">Comedy</span></b><span style="color: red; font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;">Super
Troopers<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> </span></b><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;">Like Reno-911 meets . . . well,
it is pretty much a knockoff of Reno-911, but hey, it has some really quality
laughs. You follow a Highway Patrol office as they bring down a local drug
ring—simple enough.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> Here is what sets
it apart though: after one viewing, it will not seem like much, but in the days
and weeks to come, it is pretty darn tough to find yourself not tempted to play
“Repeat” or “The Meow Game” amongst your friends and buddies. Just like that, a
low-key comedy suddenly blossoms into a surprisingly quotable and memorable
movie. The goofball cast and simple story rely little on big names or intricate
points—this is pure shenanigans at its very best.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<i><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;">Honorable
Mentions: Beerfest, Hot Fuzz (seriously, Hot Fuzz is damn good—great action,
great comedy, really British, Simon Pegg’s in it, super quotable, super cool)<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
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<b><span style="color: red; font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 18.0pt; line-height: 115%;">Science Fiction</span></b><b><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"><o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;">Twelve
Monkeys<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> In this time-travel
flick, you have Brucie Willis going back to try and hunt down the source of a
virus that wiped out five-billion folks and forced humanity underground. The
premise is intriguing, the characters are interesting, and your main man Brad
Pitt gives an Oscar-nominated performance as the prime suspect in releasing the
virus. The plot might be a little unnecessarily thick at times, but the ending
is one of the best in modern sci-fi. Great performances, a cool world, and a
huge sense of satisfaction as the puzzle pieces come together make this one to
remember—and one to wonder why you did not hear of it sooner.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<i><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;">Honorable
Mentions: Starship Troopers, Primer, Upstream Color (see below for these last
two)<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
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<b><span style="color: red; font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 18.0pt; line-height: 115%;">Romance/Rom-Com</span></b><b><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"><o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;">Lars
and the Real Girl<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> Ryan Gosling plays
a recluse who buys a hyper-realistic sex doll to keep him company. Rather than
using it for the obvious, however, he keeps it around as a simple friend. The
doll accompanies him to family events, dinner parties, and through all the
staring and murmurs, there might be a thing or two to be learned about love
here. Charming, funny—I dare say it is worth watching for man and woman alike.
Clearly, there is not really much like it out there. This is Ryan Gosling like
you have not seen him. Girls will think it is cute. Guys will find a surprising
amount of charm. Good stuff.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<i><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;">Honorable
Mentions: Blue Valentine (highly acclaimed, but not widely-seen by general
folks. WARNING: definitely a tough watch—it is another Gosling flick, but this
chronicles a failing marriage, complete with ex-boyfriend issues, kid issues,
pregnancy issues, sex issues—one of the single most depressing movies you will
watch, but memorable and thought-provoking at the very least)<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
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<b><span style="color: red; font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 18.0pt; line-height: 115%;">Thriller<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;">Buried<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> Ryan Reynolds stars
as a truck driver who, while on tour in Iraq, wakes up in a coffin buried deep
underground. As the viewer, you wake up with him (in one of the most memorable
openings in modern cinema—no kidding—it rivals the opening of <i>Children of Men</i> up there, and that is
one of the single best openings <i>ever
filmed</i>) and never leave his side for all 90 minutes of tense, gritty claustrophobia.
This is literally an entire movie filmed in a box, and the resulting movie is
nothing short of a pure thriller experience.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> This is hands-down
Ryan Reynolds best flick, and thank goodness, because this truly inventive
movie simply would not work without him. Totally delivers. If you ask me, this
is one of the most white-knuckling, force-you-to-the-edge-of-your-seat movies
put out in the last decade. Insanely tense, insanely well-done, insanely good.
And oh man—just wait until the snake arrives.<br />
<br />
<i>Honorable Mentions: The Prestige, The
Machinist, Memento (all highly-acclaimed flicks, and they each have killer
endings)<o:p></o:p></i></span></div>
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<b><span style="color: red; font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 18.0pt; line-height: 115%;">Sports</span></b><b><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"><o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;">Goon<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> </span></b><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;">Finally—a sports flick that
takes the most enjoyable aspect of its chosen competition, isolates it, and
brings it to the spectacular forefront. In this case, <i>Goon</i> is a hockey movie, and you are darn right that it is about
fighting in hockey. It might be a classic underdog story—a bouncer named Doug
is brought onto a local Canadian hockey team purely for his fighting skills,
and soon looks to go up against the best brawler in the league—but <i>Goon, </i>for all its goofiness and at times
clichéd writing, brings a tremendous amount of heart. It loves its premise,
flaunts it like crazy, brings some terrific fighting action, and it just <i>works.</i><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> This is one of
those “just trust me” kind of recommendations, but seriously, if you like
sports flicks, give <i>Goon </i> a try. You will not be sorry.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"><i>Honorable Mentions: Undefeated (see below), The Natural (highly-acclaimed, but oft-forgotten in the "movies I should show my kids" discussion)</i></span></div>
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<b><span style="color: red; font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 18.0pt; line-height: 115%;">War</span></b><b><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"><o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;">Letters
from Iwo Jima<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> Clint Eastwood made
this one as a companion piece to <i>Flags of
our Fathers</i>, and unfortunately, the Japanese perspective brought forward by
this flick was brushed aside by many a star-spangled American viewer.
Regardless, <i>Letters from Iwo Jima</i> is
far and away the better movie—the emotion is more impactful, the characters are
more interesting, and the war action is brutal, heavy, and all too real. This
is one of the rawest war flicks you will ever see, and easily one of the best
foreign-language films made in the past decade (it is all in Japanese, in case
you did not quite catch on by now).<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> Far superior to its
American partner-film in every way, this is the definition of a
criminally-unviewed movie. This is one of Clint Eastwood’s best works—demands to
be experienced.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<i><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;">Honorable
Mentions: Jarhead, Enemy at the Gates<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
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<b><span style="color: red; font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 18.0pt; line-height: 115%;">Indie</span></b><b><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"><o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;">Primer,
Upstream Color<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> </span></b><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;">Usually, when the same man
directs, produces, <i>and </i>stars in a
movie, it is a recipe for disaster (whaddup Tommy Wiseau!), but in the case of
Shane Curruth, who does exactly this in <i>both</i>
of these flicks, the result is something extraordinary, if a little abstract.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> It is impossible to
explain both of these simply, but in their essence, <i>Primer</i> is a time-travel flick and <i>Upstream Color</i> is a mind-control flick. Both, however, are far from
simple, and easily demand multiple viewings. Your first time through might be
rough in the comprehension department, but I promise, with some further reading
and a follow-up view down the road, the rewards are bountiful. The stories are
deep, thought-provoking, and intelligent. The performances, despite the lack of
any big name whatsoever, feel genuine. The style is distinguished and unique.
Even in not knowing everything after the fact, you can still sit back and know
that what you watched, whatever it was trying to say, did it well and delivered
one hell of an experience. Totally visceral and amazingly memorable, <i>Primer </i>and<i> Upstream Color</i> are absolute sleepers. Track them down, settle in,
and give them a shot—just be prepared to think about them, talk about them, and
invest in them for a long time to come.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<i><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;">Honorable
Mentions: Moonrise Kingdom</span></i><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<b><span style="color: red; font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 18.0pt; line-height: 115%;">And finally . . .</span></b><b><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"><o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;">The
Documentary<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> </span></b><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;">Really though, if there is one
thing I recommend you do this summer, it is that you hunt down some
documentaries that interest you, and watch them. Then watch more. Then find
some that you might not see normally, and watch those. Documentaries are
totally under-viewed in themselves, and believe it or not, they can offer some
of the most powerful, hard-hitting, spirit-lifting, insightful moments that the
world of movies have to offer. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> As interest varies,
taste varies, so here is a slew of general recommendations:<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> <i>The Imposter—a missing-person case takes a
sinister, twisted turn<o:p></o:p></i></span></div>
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<i><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> Undefeated—follows an inner-city Memphis
high school football team (won Best Doc. in 2012)<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
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<i><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> Restrepo—follows a unit during the War in
Afghanistan<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
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<i><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> Hoop Dreams—looks at two young men’s
aspirations to play professional basketball<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> </span></b><i><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;">Exit
Through the Gift Shop—the evolution of street art<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
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<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> Enjoy your lazy
summers, friends, but whether you are finding some down-time after your summer
job or just kicking back on a weekend, I urge you to check out some of these
flicks. Look into them and be enlightened—you might just find yourself a diamond in the rough.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
Tyler "Dazz" Daswickhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03275267111192809648noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4469998399417341322.post-13327105580888646512013-06-29T20:22:00.002-07:002013-06-29T20:22:48.678-07:00Twerking, Purple Pools, and Child Stars: Breaking Down the Miley Cyrus 'We Can't Stop' Video<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> I had to.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> For the record, these
are legit, minute-by-minute first impressions of this video. I am a Miley Cyrus
virgin, if you will, and all of the post-‘Can’t be Tamed’ stuff is new to me
(basically ever since she had that ridiculous haircut). However, all of the
hype on social media made this out to be like one of the more WTF-ey
experiences of my summer, so come on this journey with me, and for best
results, watch along with the link below. See, I include that stuff to make it
easy on you, because I appreciate you and try to be classy about it, probably
unlike what we are about to watch together.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> Best of luck to you
all.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;">0:01—</span></b><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;">Is that an ankle
monitor? Is this Lindsay Lohan? Am I on the right thing? I am already confused.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: .5in; text-indent: -.5in;">
<b><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;">0:03—</span></b><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;">Shameless Beats
promotion. Wow.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: .5in; text-indent: -.5in;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: .5in; text-indent: -.5in;">
<b><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;">0:09—</span></b><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;">When Miley first reached
into her mouth, I swear to God I thought she was just going to yank her teeth
out like a row of dentures. Turned out to be putting in a grill, but I am
literally ready for anything.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: .5in; text-indent: -.5in;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: .5in; text-indent: -.5in;">
<b><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;">0:17—</span></b><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;">After some angry combing
of Miley’s hair, we have some gal with smoke coming out of her crotch. You cannot
make this stuff up, folks.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: .5in; text-indent: -.5in;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: .5in; text-indent: -.5in;">
<b><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;">0:26—</span></b><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;">Is that a money
sandwich? And who is that guy? Is that one of Miley’s friends? I wonder how she
approached him. “Ay yo (because that is how she talks now), I wanchu to be in
my video and eat this sandwich with hunnets in it.” And if you are the dude,
how do you say no? I feel like I would just try to eat around the money so I
could pocket some later.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: .5in; text-indent: -.5in;">
<b><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;">0:38—</span></b><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;">After some more
advertising for those weird egg-meets-lip-balm things, we have the following
sequence: a skull made of French fries, a vintage Miley tongue-shot (man, who
thought those words would be put together three years ago, amiright?!), some
weird double-mouth girl, a guy who seems to be eating a tongue, and then the
French fry skull being smashed. Well this is just sensory overload.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: .5in; text-indent: -.5in;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: .5in; text-indent: -.5in;">
<b><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;">0:43—</span></b><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;">And there is Hannah
Montana’s butt. I think I choked on my own spit a little. But hey, things
cannot get much worse than this, right? <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: .5in; text-indent: -.5in;">
<b><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;">0:44—</span></b><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;">Wrong,
Tyler-from-one-second-ago, wrong wrong wrong. Hannah Montana is now spanking
the Nicki Minaj-looking gal next to her. Mistakes of the past, friends,
mistakes of the past.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: .5in; text-indent: -.5in;">
<b><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;">0:47—</span></b><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;">This round of spanking
is reciprocated back to Miley. Well I’m not sure what I was expecting . . .<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: .5in; text-indent: -.5in;">
<b><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;">1:08—</span></b><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;">Ok, let’s ignore the
teddy bear dancers for a second (again—wow) and appreciate what is so far my
favorite shot of the video. I love the dude in the background right here. Miley
trying to take center stage and all for the chorus, but now this guy doing all
his little hand signs and that “yeeeeaaaaaahhhhhhh” nod. Stole the show.
Hilarious.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: .5in; text-indent: -.5in;">
<b><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;">1:14—</span></b><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;">So Miley’s been on the
bed this whole time, writhing around and stretching her gum and trying to be
hot, but gosh it is just not working for me. She just has that psycho-vibe now.
Totally unfit for our Celebrity Crush Power Rankings, and no amount of twerking
will sway me.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: .5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;">And how about that horrible
polygonal face doing the deep-computer voice? The budget clearly ran out on
them—the Beats must not have covered the poop-electronic voiceovers.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: .5in; text-indent: -.5in;">
<b><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;">1:25—</span></b><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;">That dude from seventeen
seconds ago is back! And get this—he does the <i>exact same thing</i> in this new shot. Stands there, rocks his hand to
the beat twice, and adds nothing to the song. Who is this guy?!<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: .5in; text-indent: -.5in;">
<b><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;">1:26—</span></b><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;">Gosh, you feel like it
would be time for a twerking montage sooner or later.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: .5in; text-indent: -.5in;">
<b><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;">1:27—</span></b><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;">Anddddddd boom goes the
dynamite.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: .5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;">Guys, Miley Cyrus was just
clearly out-twerked in her own video, and it was not even close. The exercise
bike spank move and the standalone attempt did nothing to help her case either.
Poor showing.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: .5in; text-indent: -.5in;">
<b><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;">1:49—</span></b><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;">Someone was high for the
last fifteen seconds of this video. “Guys, guys . . . guys, I got somethin’ to
say—this idea for the thing . . . we have these goats, right? And—and they’re
wearing sunglasses because of the fame and the music and it’s all jus wow, and
then—and then there’s a purple pool and a Barbie that kinda looks like Miley
but kinda doesn’t and then they kiss and everyone in the pool is like
yeeeeeeaaaaahhhh because we fight the system.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: .5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;">“. . . that could work.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: .5in; text-indent: -.5in;">
<b><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;">1:56—</span></b><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;">Anyone else have an
incomplete F*** sign on YouTube? So ironic.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: .5in; text-indent: -.5in;">
<b><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;">2:02—</span></b><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;">More crotch-smoke! This
is quickly becoming the birth/conception video of the monster from <i>Lost.</i> Totally understand why it went to
the island now—explains the whole show.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: .5in; text-indent: -.5in;">
<b><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;">2:23—</span></b><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;">I apologize, I totally
neglected the actually content of the song. In case it was not obvious, Miley
Cyrus and her purple-pool-pals own the night. And are ‘bout that life. As a
result, they simply <i>cannot </i>stop
shooting smoke out of their crotches and poser-twerking and spanking Nicki
Minaj lookalikes. Sounds fair.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: .5in; text-indent: -.5in;">
<b><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;">2:27—</span></b><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;">As we cut to the
deep-computer voice again for the bridge, we have a lovely shot of some
rando-dude rubbing white bread on his face and then eating the face-oil-soaked
slice. We have an entire 60 seconds to go.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: .5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;">I am suddenly reminded of the
whole Liam Hemsworth thing, and while I am Wikipedia-ing whether they are
engaged or married I come across a total gem. Did you know Miley Cyrus was in <i>Big Fish</i> back in 2003? This is
pre-Hannah Montana! Wow! In the credits she is listed as Destiny Cyrus. What
are the odds she goes back to that name? 10-to-1? 5-to-1? <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: .5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;">But anyway, Miley and Liam have
to be lurking on that list of couples that you literally do not understand how
the hell they are together. I mean, for his birthday one year, she gave him a
chocolate penis-cake (sorry innocence, but in these dark times, you have to be
blunt), and then she ate the whole thing! That was the gift: her eating it—<i>he did not even get a piece. </i>Absurd.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;">2:38—</span></b><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;">Miley breaks a
liquor-shaped piñata so a bunch of cigars tumble out, and <i>that same all-star from the background</i> runs up and lights one. It
is settled: he was not even supposed to be on set—he was just in it for the
quality herbage. Exceptional.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: .5in; text-indent: -.5in;">
<b><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;">2:44—</span></b><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;">Dang, guys. You know
what this needs? More aggressive, unattractive body-grabbing.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: .5in; text-indent: -.5in;">
<b><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;">2:46—</span></b><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;">Thanks Miley!<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: .5in; text-indent: -.5in;">
<b><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;">3:14—</span></b><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;">Man, this house party is
outta control: where’s Billy Ray? But actually, where the hell is Billy Ray
Cyrus? That guy has dropped off the face of the earth. A better question
though: who cares? I just touché-d myself . . . wow, that looks a lot like ‘touched
myself’. Disaster averted. It might be time to wrap up.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: .5in; text-indent: -.5in;">
<b><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;">3:30—</span></b><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;">We close with
essentially a giant ‘eff you’ to just about everyone. The last fifteen seconds
are literally alternating shots of Miley flexing her butt and sticking her
tongue out, which means I have pretty much satisfied my life quota for both of
these Cyrus-related things.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: .5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;">I wish I had an eyewash
station.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
Tyler "Dazz" Daswickhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03275267111192809648noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4469998399417341322.post-48636080939443373042013-06-25T12:53:00.001-07:002013-06-25T12:54:17.663-07:00True Ice in his Veins: Why Nik Wallenda's Skywire is Still the Story of the Week<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgS8HX5dUoQtWPYxFyN8Hge-ml7ucVPW8O1Wpynx1l4cyEyhhYjXn6nubzsX3CSM8ae_W5ypTZZBpOa2AnPUdgE8nWoO3J70BRXcfkjwqVt6Cg40RhlG6XGoXCLYalB3nV4NNjwegz2YK9k/s1600/4c3b.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="218" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgS8HX5dUoQtWPYxFyN8Hge-ml7ucVPW8O1Wpynx1l4cyEyhhYjXn6nubzsX3CSM8ae_W5ypTZZBpOa2AnPUdgE8nWoO3J70BRXcfkjwqVt6Cg40RhlG6XGoXCLYalB3nV4NNjwegz2YK9k/s320/4c3b.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> Wow, what a week in
sports, friends. We crowned a NBA Champion in the Miami Heat, the Chicago
Blackhawks hoisted the Stanley Cup in hockey, the NFL fulfilled its annual
quota for a WTF-crime (Deadspin or something should really do a Criminal of the
Year—maybe that can be our thing; I can write it down next to the Celebrity
Crush Power Rankings), and Spain’s international soccer team beat Just-happy-to-be-here-Tahiti
10-0.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> Oh, and a guy <i>freaking crossed the Grand Canyon by walking
on a wire.</i><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> Although folks in
Chicago might beg to differ (not folks in Miami though, they don’t care about
anything), Nik Wallenda’s quarter-mile Skywire event was the story of the week,
and if you ask me, one of the most intense things I have ever seen on
television.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> It is not every day
you father rushes home, bursts into the family room, and tells everyone to turn
on the Discovery Channel. There was Nik, all by himself, 1500 feet above the
bottom of the Grand Canyon, balancing on a cable barely two inches wide, with
no net below him. If I can tell you one thing about watching this live, it is
that the worst moment was when you first see it. My heart jolted. I could not
look away. I waited. In those first few minutes, all you do is just wait for
something horrible to happen. There is very little quite like it.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> The Discovery
Channel made two brilliant moves: putting a microphone on Nik, and putting a
camera on him. By far the craziest shots were from our hero’s perspective—a top-down
view of his feet as they step . . . step . . . step high above what would
absolutely be certain death. Even watching at home, it was nuts. As a
spectator, there was no looking away; it barely seemed an option in your brain.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> As mentally taxing
as it is to watch, it is impossible to fathom the mental toughness of a
highwire walker themselves. Consider that Wallenda was essentially a constant
stream of prayers and thanks and assurances for all 22 minutes of his walk—it takes
one hell of a focus and one hell of a presence of mind. If a bird swoops down
and he jerks up to react—game over. If that wind that harassed him catches him
even a little off guard—game over. If sweat rolls into his eyes, he has to just
deal with it, because clearing his vision would see him waiver—game over. That
is why the microphone was such a great move. We heard all his mental checks
throughout the whole thing; he reminded himself where he was, what he was
doing, what he had left to do—the guy was sharp.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> The prayers, too,
were very telling. Does it not just <i>make
sense</i>, for a guy who has formed a career out of death-defying stunts, to
have such insane faith, in not only God, but himself? Whether you are a
believer or not, it was downright inspiring. This is someone who comes from a
long line of highwire-walkers, someone who has had extended family members die
from doing this very same thing, and someone who continues to achieve through
some types of adversity that the rest of us might not ever feel. Amazing.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> In sports analysis, there is a lot of talk
about the people who are considered to have “ice in their veins.” Michael
Jordan, Adam Vinatieri, Abby Wambach, Muhammad Ali, <s>Tim Tebow</s>, David
Ortiz—these were the guys and gals who, in their primes, just plain finished the
job, and looking at that list, you have a group of people who, as lame and
cornball as it sounds, had faith in themselves. That is where it starts. That
sees the ice begin to flow in the veins—you have to believe you will deliver,
hope alone is not enough (this might be a whole other article, but LeBron James
might be growing to realize this). Bottom line: Nik Wallenda has ice in his
veins, and he belongs among the top clutch athletes of our time. He is doing
what no one has ever done before, in a way few of us have ever experienced. He
is doing it with grace, poise, and an amazing story to back it all up. This is a guy to keep track of in the years to
come.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> Celebrate your
championships—these moments are a dime a dozen, and there is nothing quite like
them, but there is even less like crossing the Grand Canyon on a highwire, and
we should definitely not lose sight of that. Few sports experiences have been
as gut-wrenchingly intense as this, but darn it if I cannot wait for the next
Nik Wallenda feat.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> We have one of the
all-time greats in their field putting on a show before our very eyes—let’s
give him the respect he deserves. Nik Wallenda has always delivered—quietly,
humbly, assuredly—not something we see a lot in the modern world of sports.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> Then again, not a
lot of Nik Wallenda is seen in the modern world of sports, and maybe that is the best thing of all. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
Tyler "Dazz" Daswickhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03275267111192809648noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4469998399417341322.post-16653021391261605812013-06-21T16:04:00.000-07:002013-06-21T17:39:58.426-07:00Thoughts from Game 7: How to Handle Things When the Bad Guys Win<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEipnFDRtNfaGT_G788t-E15neemTUG5lRIXeDA1kllPZnugcIsrQ6CFA_tKmb5B2ZukZloN75JDsx15lUCf3N76wCjeVmd68ZoRtp1oXv7ZBMRkCxM3SjIAdBGxKkKmzm2S4204WvfOxAJq/s1600/425316_455396467887949_1241002307_n.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="216" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEipnFDRtNfaGT_G788t-E15neemTUG5lRIXeDA1kllPZnugcIsrQ6CFA_tKmb5B2ZukZloN75JDsx15lUCf3N76wCjeVmd68ZoRtp1oXv7ZBMRkCxM3SjIAdBGxKkKmzm2S4204WvfOxAJq/s320/425316_455396467887949_1241002307_n.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> </span></b><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;">Fifteen minutes into Game 7 of
the NBA Finals, my old pal Emilio shows up to our little reserved corner at the
sports bar. The first obvious question my friend Nolan and I throw at him, “Who
ya going for tonight?” <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> Emilio replies
confidently, “Boston!” and we all laugh. We explain to him that this game features
the Heat and the Spurs, and his response was oddly appropriate. “Oh yeah? Don’t
know, don’t care. Either way I’m waking up tomorrow and the world is still
turning.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> It was funny at the
time, but wise Emilio had just uttered the single biggest drink of water we had
all night. More on that in a minute.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> Some general
thoughts on the game: I think it would be easy right now to call out Tim Duncan
for missing that game-tying shot (and the tip-in that followed) at about the
30-second mark in the fourth quarter. Take a step back though: he was the Spurs’
leading scorer last night, and the only San Antonio player to top 20 points. He
made it to the free throw line more than any other player on either team (he
and LeBron tied with eight attempts each), and finished with a
more-than-respectable 24-12. Meanwhile, Tony Parker went 3-for-12 from the
field, Danny Green was a stiff 1-for-12, and Manu “My bald spot spreads with
every miss” Ginobili had arguably the worst fourth quarter in recent Finals
memory. Duncan played his guts out, and it is downright silly to point the choke-job
finger at him. The Spurs as a team shot 37% from the floor for Chrissake. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> On the other side
of things, the Heat offense last night essentially was channeled through three
people: James, Wade, and Battier (Mario Chalmers took fifteen shots, sure, but
at the same time, it’s Mario Chalmers, and to say that anything channels
through him is absolute heresy—plus this is my blog and I do what I want). Battier
shot the lights out (6-for-8 from three!), Dwayne Wade had a 23-10, and of
course, LeBron went psycho. The Spurs dared him to take threes, and he made
five of them. Look at the points in the paint for this game—San Antonio
executed their defensive game-plan pretty darn well, actually—they outscored
the Heat in this area 48-24. The Heat just made the jump shots, and that made
the difference.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> The difference
sucked though, right? The bad guys won! A brash, cocky, inflated group of
players (from the worst sports city in America nonetheless) beat out the
small-market, team-first, quietly-brilliant group of guys from little old San
Antonio. Tim Duncan, the best power forward of all time, is not going to have
the perfect ending. Gregg Popovich might not be on the coaching Mount Rushmore.
Manu Ginobili seemingly threw away (quite literally) his shot to be considered an
all-time great player. A lot of things were in the balance last night, and when
we saw the zeroes, the bad guys had all the glory, and the good guys had
joyless, empty-handed second.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> But in sports, the
bad guys win all the time. Duke beat Butler. Kobe Bryant, <s>a rapist and</s>
one of the worst teammates ever, has won five championships. Ben
Roethlisberger, <s>another rapist,</s> beat Kurt “Sorry Tebow, but God saved
all the winning for me” Warner in the Super Bowl. Sports are designed so the
best teams win, not so the good guys win. This is not <i>Hoosiers</i>, or <i>Rocky II, </i>or
<i>The Karate Kid.</i> This is real life,
and real life, obviously, is far from fair. Life is not a movie, so in life,
the bad guys do not always see the just desserts.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> So what can we do?
What can the 66% of ESPN’s SportsNation who declared their allegiance to the
Spurs last night do in the face of this loss? You have to dig deeper than the “selfish”
LeBron Jameses or the “dirty” Dwayne Wades. In this modern NBA, one that is
rife with me-first thugs and, as my dad likes to bluntly put it, “goddamn
gangbangers”, you need to dig a little deeper to find the good stuff. Shane
Battier is on that Heat team, and he might be considered one of the most
selfless players in basketball. LeBron James has done a ton of community work
during his career, and while that good-guy side might be overshadowed by <i>The Decision</i> and the old Welcome Party “not
one, not two . . .” videos, it is still there. LeBron the father is still there
too. Sitting behind us at the bar was a born-and-raised Miami couple, who had
been cheering for the Heat since the team arrived in town in 1988. That Game 7
must have been a pretty cool moment for them (and hey, it seems not all Heat
fans are shoving out early).<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> There are some
silver linings to be found, and while it might look bleak for the Spurs right
now, things will turn around. As wise Emilio voiced mere minutes into his
arrival, we woke up today and the world kept turning. The good guys will have
more chances. That is the beauty of sports—they are not going anywhere, so
there are always going to be more feel-good stories. There will be more Little Giants against the 2007 Spygate Patriots, there will be more Jamaican bobsled teams, and there will be more Miracles on Ice, on the girdiron, and on the hardcourt. There will be more movie moments, maybe not today, but soon.</span></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> </span></b><span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;">So congrats to the Heat, and to
their fanbase (except for that total douche who was in the third row last night
wearing a freaking Steph Curry jersey—you will receive none of my
acknowledgement and may you burn in sports hell—by the dubs, I am not bitter),
the better team won, and this championship was well-deserved. To everyone else,
hang in there. Laugh at Lebron’s receding hairline. Reminisce of the days when
Pop blew off sideline reporters. Applaude the Battiers. Legacies will sort
themselves out, and really, what was this to the resumes of the Spurs’ stars, a
gold star? They will be fine.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> Let’s look back on a
terrific NBA season—we had some classic games, remarkable achievements, and an
offseason full of good old-fashioned drama ahead of us. Did everyone come out a
winner? Of course not (Suns fans, how the heck are ya?!), but sports are not
supposed to work that way. When things do work out though—wow, is it sweet.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> We waste too much
energy complaining about the bad guys winning in sports, so let’s take a lesson
from one of the best, and let’s take our talents somewhere else.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
Tyler "Dazz" Daswickhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03275267111192809648noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4469998399417341322.post-38786469188485488752013-06-14T14:37:00.000-07:002013-06-14T14:37:26.794-07:00Taking Flight, Former Gladiators, and the Darth Vader All-Stars: Man of Steel Review<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh8ePNHQVFnuwSr7q0PofDVchDEObe9xthb-HFwPVz1UUNdSUkUZvieYa4wRJ80DDm3fhssyfUbes2I7PBXzd3BO8JJl26rSL1M8b6E7W_Wu0cNtumjM6aBu246e6DaRfHGzgxOEQhytdPf/s1600/2013_man_of_steel_movie-wide.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh8ePNHQVFnuwSr7q0PofDVchDEObe9xthb-HFwPVz1UUNdSUkUZvieYa4wRJ80DDm3fhssyfUbes2I7PBXzd3BO8JJl26rSL1M8b6E7W_Wu0cNtumjM6aBu246e6DaRfHGzgxOEQhytdPf/s320/2013_man_of_steel_movie-wide.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> The first Superman movie came with one of the
greatest taglines of all time, “You will believe a man can fly”<i>, </i>and for film-nuts around the world,
the heart of its greatness lay in the sole fact that, for a moment, they did.
Now, <i>Man of Steel</i> is asking us to do
more. It is asking us to return to the origins of Kal-El and believe in not
just a man, but a symbol, and through all of its grand ambition, it somehow
pulls it off.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> One thing that you have to understand going
into this flick is that, far and away, this telling of the Superman story has
much more of an alien-oriented focus than, say, the Christopher Reeve
portrayal. <i>Man of Steel </i>wants to
emphasize above all else that Superman is foreign here on Earth—he does not
belong; he is inherently different. The story begins with the fall of Krypton—finally
captured like it was meant to look, thanks to some beautiful CGI work—and goes
on to follow the newly-named Clark Kent as he discovers his powers, his
purpose, and his true origins. Throughout the tale, however, the viewer is
constantly reminded of the divide between Superman and humans. Whether it is in
tales of childhood heroics (or in some cases, the lack of heroics), tragedy, or
modest triumphs, our hero faces the consequences of being an extraordinary
being on ordinary Earth, and <i>Man of Steel</i>
achieves this incredibly.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> This is a Superman really unlike any other,
in the sense that it brings more emotion, more weight, and more scope than ever
before. It is one of the most ambitious superhero movies in recent memory, and
the result is nothing short of an absolute epic. Superman struggles with his
orphanage, his relationship with Ma and Pa Kent, the imminent threat of General
Zod, and the ultimate acceptance of who he is to mankind. It sounds like a lot
to put onto one man, but Henry Cavill handles the Supes with grace, authority,
and assurance. He may not have all of the dorky charm of Reeve back in the day,
but above all, we have a truly noble Superman here, and one that I would love
to see again.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> The supporting cast is admirable as well,
especially seen in both Superman’s biological and adopted fathers. Russell
Crowe is terrific as the tragically-fated Jor-El (he also has his best action
scene since <i>Gladiator</i> in here—be excited,
you can finally cheer on the Crowe again), and Kevin Costner has a good chance
to break into the Darth Vader All-Stars (you know, famous movie dads—Darth,
Mufasa, Sean Connery from <i>Last Crusade</i>,
Daniel Day-Lewis in <i>There Will be Blood,</i>
and Vito and Michael Corleone) as Jonathan Kent. There is a forecast of
man-tears in this one, and it is all his fault. Wow. The other notables, like
Amy Adams as Lois Lane or Michael Shannon as General Zod, bring the appropriate
level of respective charm and intensity. Look out for Ayelet Zurer as Superman’s
real mother and Antje Traue as Zod’s primary follower—they do not have a ton of
screen time, but they do quite well in spite of that. No one phones it in here,
and thank goodness.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> What is most astounding about <i>Man of Steel</i> is that for all that it is
trying to do, it rarely misses the mark. The multitude of conflicts that
Superman faces here, both on a psychological and interpersonal level, come to a
head at some point or another in the flick, and all of them saw me
appropriately stunned, awed, or with my mouth hanging open like an idiot. They all
worked. Prepare for some ‘wow moments’, because they are certainly coming.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> Speaking of which, I can say with full
confidence and a good deal of reflection that <i>Man of Steel</i> has probably the best action sequences I have ever
seen in a superhero movie. In terms of raw one-on-one fighting between Kal-El
and the bad guys, you probably have not seen combat this intense since the
now-infamous armored truck chase in <i>The
Dark Knight</i>. Superman flicks in the past have been relatively light on
brawling, but this one provides it in droves. It is fast, powerful, and at
times even brutal—especially in terms of the final showdown between our hero
and General Zod. Probably one of the best final battles in superhero-movie
history; it is exceptionally done. Beautifully shot, intensely choreographed,
and unflinchingly relentless, <i>Man of
Steel</i> somehow manages to succeed as a pure action movie even in the midst
of its epic themes. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> If I have any gripes, it is that the
dialogue (especially with Zod) can occasionally be campy, and some of the
symbolism with the Supes can be spread on a little bit thick. Subtlety was
never what this movie was about, but it might have helped—when you have the
fairly-obvious Christ pose sticking out amidst one of our hero’s many acts of
valor, it can be a little overwhelming and a tad forced. In this way only, its
ambition can be seen as a little bit of hindrance. There was just so much they
wanted to do, it is hard to be quite sure if they achieved it all to the very
maximum. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> All in all, though, these are things that
will be forgotten in the wake of another stirring Hans Zimmer score, the best
action Zach Snyder has ever directed (better than <i>300—</i>he never leaned on slo-mo), and profound successes on the
emotional front. This is the most feeling we have had in a Superman movie since
we first believed that a man could fly.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> Is it perfect? No, but <i>Man of Steel </i>is one of the most purely satisfying superhero movies
to come around in a long time. Grand in its ambition and spectacular in its
scope, this is a Superman movie that, like its hero, strives to be something
greater, and it became just that. An 8.5 out 0f 10 is where it lands—and it is
a glorious one at that. Never fear—Superman is here, and he is everything you
hoped he would be.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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Tyler "Dazz" Daswickhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03275267111192809648noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4469998399417341322.post-66638048390412186042013-06-05T18:49:00.003-07:002013-06-05T18:49:29.202-07:00The Bus Stops Here: The Breanna Bogucki Story<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> I usually do not
bring into According to Dazz what I do for Medill at Northwestern, but this was
different. For the past few weeks, I have been working on a multimedia package
for a class concerning various outlets for adaptive sports in the area, particularly
for people with physical and intellectual disabilities. Through my talks with
Special Olympics Illinois, I was introduced to Miss Breanna Bogucki, a young
Special Olympics athlete about to complete her freshman year of high school. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> Breanna has high-functioning
autism, but that is hardly the first thing you notice about her. She has a lot
of athletic talent (over 50 Special Olympics medals in just over six years of
competition—count ‘em!), a bright personality, and a terrific passion for
singing to boot. In less than two weeks, one of her original songs will play to
open the Summer Games—in front of over ten thousand people.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> Her story was a joy
to tell, and honestly, two and a half minutes does not quite do her justice. A total
inspiration. Thanks everyone, and enjoy the audio piece (the first link!)—and if you want to see
one of Breanna’s performances, I threw the YouTube video in at the end.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<a href="http://tylerdaswickjournalism.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/06/The-Bus-Stops-Here-the-Breanna-Bogucki-Story.mp3" target="_blank">The Bus Stops Here: The Breanna Bogucki Story</a><br />
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Tyler "Dazz" Daswickhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03275267111192809648noreply@blogger.com0